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Community Rules
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Moderator Guidelines
Moderator Guidelines
- Don’t be mean to users. Be gentle or neutral.
- Most moderator actions which have a modlog message should include your username.
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- Don’t waste time debating/arguing with problematic users.
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- Ask another mod to take over cases you struggle with, if you get tired, or when things get personal.
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- Share everything you do in the mod matrix, both so several mods aren't unknowingly handling the same issues, but also so you can receive feedback on what you intend to do.
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- Send users concise DMs about verdicts about them, such as bans etc, except in cases where it is clear we don’t want them at all, such as obvious transphobes. No need to notify someone they haven’t been banned of course.
- Explain to a user why their behavior is problematic and how it is distressing others rather than engage with whatever they are saying. Ask them to avoid this in the future and send them packing if they do not comply.
- First warn users, then temp ban them, then finally perma ban them when they break the rules or act inappropriately. Skip steps if necessary.
- Use neutral statements like “this statement can be considered transphobic” rather than “you are being transphobic”.
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- Remember you are a voluntary moderator. You don’t get paid. Take a break when you need one. Perhaps ask another moderator to step in if necessary.
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Straight facts:
I am a straight man. Hello everyone. I hope you're all having a wonderful day.
Also a fact, I support all peoples choices in terms of what they like and how they identify. Not sure why I would care if someone else wants to be gay, bi, trans, hereto/cis, queer, lesbian, etc. I'm not those things, I'm not sure why it would bother anyone that someone else likes things? Whatever.
Also a fact from a straight guy, aka, straight fact.
While I can recognise that some masculine figures are handsome/good looking, I do not.... And I can't stress this enough.... I do not feel any attraction to men.
They can be rather good looking, but that doesn't make me want to get them naked and fool around.
If you have excitement in your pants for someone of the same gender, well.... I have news for you.... And there's nothing wrong with that.
Be who you are. Anybody who gives a shit is probably not worth knowing.
A term that I find useful is "~~platonic~~ aesthetic attraction".
It's a term that I learned through the ace community when I was going through the common bisexual experience of "am I bi though, or am I just asexual?". It turned out I was bi, but I find the split model of attraction is a useful framework.
~~Platonic~~ Aesthetic attraction is when you're able to see someone and go "now that is a beautiful man", but not experience any attraction in the conventional sense of the word. I personally find it useful because even though I do experience sexual or romantic attraction to people of all genders, that doesn't mean I experience that for everyone. Sometimes a beautiful person is just a beautiful person.
Edit: got mixed up, and said "Platonic attraction" when I meant "aesthetic attraction". Thanks to @gerryflap@feddit.nl for the correction
I’ve always heard platonic attraction as a strong desire to form a deep platonic connection with a specific person. It’s wanting to be close with a person and form a deep bond, but no sexual or physical connection.
I think you’re just describing finding a person attractive vs being attracted to a person. I haven’t heard a term for it before.