purple one is to die for
this post was submitted on 30 Nov 2025
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No added preservatives!
THEY ARE ADDED PRESERVATIVES!
I was gonna say. There's none added because that's what they are.
"Oops, all preservatives."
"Oops, all preservatives."
I think mass-produced factory loaves of bread also should include this on their labels because have you noticed the past couple decades that bread never gets moldy anymore, regardless how long it's neglected in its plastic packaging?
Exactly, thank you. There are no added preservatives. Just the preservatives, as requested.
People are so toxic that they want to be toxic after they die too.
I just want to be dumped off at the landfill or ground up and used for fertilizer after giving up any useful organs.
It’s surprisingly difficult to get that treatment.
Just compost me. Throw my body into the green cart. Why do I need to spend so much money?
Even in death we must feed the machine.
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Had this conversation recently when my wife died. She wanted to be cremated with no embalming but wanted a visitation. In the US you have to be embalmed to have a visitation. No amount of pleading to just put her in an ice bath would work sadly.
You can't have a visitation with someone who has been cremated? Are you positive thats not a state specific thing?
Maybe there is something else you can call it? It just surprises me because my grandmother and an uncle where both cremated, and we had services. I thought they were visitations.
I think they meant she wanted her body to be seen before cremation, and the funeral home wouldn't do that without embalming her.
I see I see. Ok yea that I could believe.
Yea, this is it. Guess it wasn't s clear. Visitation and then cremation.
because the funereal business is a sham.
can't have y without x and if you get x you need z. we've conveniently packaged it together in our x-z package for a low cost of $6999. isn't this what the dearly departed would want from you? don't they deserve the best??
and that's why I'm a complete fucking asshole. I don't deserve the best. I deserve to rot in a culvert on the outskirts of the airport.
I mean, sure. You do you.
Same vibe:
I wish I could read all of that text clearly
Metaflow Arterial Conditioner looks delicious
Wow your arteries are glowing! What conditioner do you use?
It works best when used in combination with Metaflow Arterial Shampoo.
Rinse and repeat.
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(1 replies)
They look delicious, but I want to be deep fried when I die.
From left to right; peach, watermelon, lemon, grape, apple, guava.
Far left is actually Dragon Fruit Splash™. Its got electrolytes.
It's what corpses crave!
brains?
🤘metalflow! 🤘
Looks apple flavored tho
You know how when you were a kid you'd mix all the flavours from the soda fountain?
Fittingly, we always called that a suicide.
We called it a graveyard, still works lol
Same.
...Why the fuck did we call it that??
Dunno... We called it Bonani-Tea
I've never heard that one before. Is that pronounced like "boe naan ee tea"? Where did you grow up?
In Germany. I think a friend of mine just made that up, it doesn't have a meaning but it sounds nice.
If you really wanna nail the pronunciation, you have to say all the vowels straight, no diphthongs. So don't bent the "o" to an "ou". Boh-nah-nee comes close.
What, there's no morticians on this platform to explain exactly what each of these does to a body?
I'll go with pink or whatever the colour on the right is.
Imagine getting drunk, breaking into a morgue and seeing this.
I'd think anything that involved an open casket would be red tinted. Who wants to see grandma in her casket with visibly green veins...
Introfiant for me thanks
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