Of course I have a praise kink, I was a bright child who built my entire identity around the approval I got from others. I wasn't ignored — far from it, but the manner of attention really did a number on me
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Ah yes, the "gifted kid to burnout (trans girl) with a praise kink" pipeline I keep hearing about.
I was told I was a bright kid, ignored and only complimented as criticism so I deeply mistust compliments.
There are literally no pictures of me as a child except the ones from my grandmother’s scrapbooks, which were mostly whole family photos.
i wish there were no photos of me as a child either
It goes well with not remembering almost all of my childhood.
amusing, I still get ignored as an adult. if it wasn't for work, I'd have zero human contact.
Childhood trauma based kinks are for the weak-minded; the best kinks are an ever-changing landscape informed by one's intellectual and social frontiers
This feels like an advanced form of kink shaming, or maybe kink shaming on a meta level 😄
I prefer to think of it as constructive kink criticism
Ah, so that’s why I like sex in public places so much. I’m not a deviant - I’m expanding my frontiers!
And everybody else's!
Seriously.
Huh I wonder what being overly questioned would lead to then
I grew up like that. My mom never understood me and was constantly baffled by my (clearly autistic/ADHD) habits. Add in getting in trouble in school for those same habits and constantly having to explain myself, and it’s a difficult reflex to break as an adult.
Finding someone on your wavelength, who knows why you said/did what you said/did without needing to explain it, is an incredible feeling. I surround myself with others in my “neurotribe” and it goes far to helping in that regard. I don’t have to explain my thought processes to my GF (though I still do sometimes.) And likewise, sometimes I can stop her from over-explaining, and let her save her energy, because “I get it.”
I hope you’ll be able to find such like-minded people someday, if you haven’t already. It’s not a “kink” per se, but boy does it help you feel “normal” in a world that’s so quick to judge.
Nah I've never found anyone but as an adult I don't get questioned about what I'm doing nearly as much
Perhaps a kink for someone ignoring you/bored of you?
excellent post, way to go!!
soooooo like -----..... is it juuuuuuuuuuuust the praise kink ----- like - jussssst that?--------
(u dont have to answer.,. im jus bein sili vout a thing im preddi sure u r not into - or dun kno what im talkin bout-)
i have a major praise kink, but an inability to ask for anything and a predisposition to take care of people so normally i end up the one praising.
That’s not the worst scenario, provided that your partner is the same way. One of the best habits I’ve picked up from work is “behavior-specific praising.” So here we go:
I love how you do your best to take care of others! The way you shower compliments onto people is really sweet, and I bet it makes your partner(s) feel amazing. It sounds like you’ve formed a positive habit that brings more joy into the world, and that is a beautiful thing. Keep it up! 🌸
oooooh i see,,.. yessssyesyesyes i totally understans that.... askin for things is hard....,.,..... especially when it comes to adult things (i feel)..,... mhm mhm - ,,... jus umm......hmmm.... iguess now i gotta look up what a praise kink actually looks like - (i can..... imagine but mayb my imagination is wrong!!)