Back in the 2010’s one of the managers at my wife’s previous job was also at an event we were at and he asked her how our preparations were going for our move to another country. You know how he found out? He was dating my wife’s aunt (mother’s sister), and my wife only told her mother of our plans because she didn’t want to make a big deal out of it with her extended family.
this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2026
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One day when I was a teen, my mother came up to me and said, “I shouldn’t be telling you this, but-“
I quickly said “Then don’t.”
She stopped dead in her tracks and looked at me in shock. “What do you mean?”
“If you’re not suppose to tell me something, then don’t tell me. Don’t tell anyone.”
She slowly turned and walked away, dejected.
I stopped telling both of my parents anything personal or compromising at a young age because I couldn’t trust either of them to hold it in confidence.
Some people find sharing secrets builds relationships. I don’t understand it though
Sharing secrets builds trust. Smart people share innocuous secrets.
If I become president I'll build trust with foreign diplomats by sharing the nuclear codes
Sharing secrets builds trust, sharing other peoples secrets erodes it.
My mother gets vague info from me now because anything I share immediately get told to all her friends and the rest of the family
Also my lazy ass, who doesn’t want call every extended family member for medium important news: just tell ist mom without NDA and wait for a few days.