Telemetry is in Server -> General -> Allow Anonymous Usage Collection. When you opt-out, it also send a final message to the server that you've opted out. The the telemetry itself looks reasonable, I don't mind sending it. It's really just the dark pattern of opt-out vs of opt-in that bothers me.
The donate button is the heart in the bottom left menu (not visible in the settings). It's unobtrusive. I wouldn't bother to remove it, except the tooltip says that I have to pay to remove it - now it has to go. Asking for donations is fine, but asking for money to remove a button is disgusting.
That's a good book, not terribly deep but very much fun to read. I'm sure bots thinking they are human has been done several times. First show that comes to mind is Westworld, which is kind of centered around that idea.