But that wouldn't be as funny. Der Bart, derrrrrrrrr.
this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2025
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Strictly speaking, German names aren't supposed to have articles at all! Though it is absolutely a thing in colloquial/dialect usage to say things like "Ich bin der Bart" (I am the Bart).
There is "der Bart" as in "the beard". Which would be an interesting choice for someone beardless.
I believe its custom in some parts of Germany to use an article before the name. In North Rhine Westphalia (West Germany) I've often heard people say "Die Jenny, Der Thomas", etc when referring to people