this post was submitted on 23 Oct 2025
770 points (97.3% liked)

Microblog Memes

9797 readers
549 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 31 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Una@europe.pub 50 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

Wouldn't it make more sense to bring them to a scientist, or at least if they as "bring me to your leader" say "you are looking at one, pal"

[–] recentSlinky@lemmy.ca 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yes, and it would be one of the scientists working in the extraterrestrial center of the UN. That's not what it's called, i forgot and I'm too lazy to look it up.

My guess though is that it would probably be the best authority to talk to aliens.

[–] breg@discuss.tchncs.de 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs (UNOOSA)

[–] copd@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What the fuck do they get paid to do all day? Must be one hell of a jolly

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 month ago

Address dumb alien conspiracy theories on the internet mostly

[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Scientists aren't usually leaders, and me saying that I'm a leader would be an obvious lie, and I'm not going to outright lie at someone who came here with a spaceship from lightyears away.

[–] Una@europe.pub 2 points 1 month ago

Nah, I'm gonna lie and I'm gonna make perfect steak out of their meat 🤤🤤

[–] architectonas@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Which kind of scientist would you send?

[–] SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Maybe an astrobiologist, linguist, and anthropologist?

Edit: probably some physicists as well, someone who can help build up a common mutual understanding from universal physical constants and so on

[–] MadMadBunny@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ah, you mean Rick Sanchez, and his grandson Morty!

[–] SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Oh right, I meant seperate scientists. I missed that the original word wasn't plural lmao

Realistically you would have a whole team though

[–] Best_Jeanist@discuss.online 2 points 1 month ago

Daniel Jackson and Sam Carter will do

[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 2 points 1 month ago

Xenogoopologist to study the aliens' goop.

[–] tuff_wizard@aussie.zone 2 points 1 month ago

Psychology researcher?

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Wouldn’t it make more sense to bring them to a scientist

Have you seen the state Jordan B. Peterson is in right now? He's absolutely not ready for space aliens. Dude's too invested in four day harmonous time cubes and Women as arch-typical Australian dragons.

[–] Una@europe.pub 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

So you are saying i should make alien barbecue?

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

On Soviet Space Station, Alien BBQ You.

[–] Karl@literature.cafe 2 points 1 month ago

If I was visiting an alien world, there's no way I'm visiting the scientists. What are the chances the first thing they do won't be ripping open my stomach?

[–] Fizz@lemmy.nz 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)

America would scoop that alien up and have him locked in a 5 hr Joe rorgan podcast within an hour of setting foot om earth.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Rogan hits blunt "A buddy of mine saw you naked in the shower during a DMT trip"

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Jamie(?), pull that up

[–] helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Tell them to run. They're safer out there than here.

[–] Soup@lemmy.world 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If they made it all the way here they’d definitely kick our asses by themselves and they’d definitely know that we are, as a group, a planetary trailer-park. Alien who let us pull one over on them would have to be astronomically(heh) stupid.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 20 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I mean, yes but also - think about the sheer marvels of mechanical, electrical, and software engineering carefully packed into an average modern car... and now think about your average driver

[–] Serinus@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

(Your point being the alien drivers. Just in case anyone needed that.)

[–] Soup@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I was thinking about how to say just that, but unless the aliens were at “tourist” level with interstellar travel I doubt they’d be doing first contact with such little planning.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

There's a funny 90s film I saw once on TV about some US midwestern family driving through space in their car, but have to make a pit stop (crash landing?) on Earth. They're immediately seized by the US government who grill and torture the dad on how their vehicle works, and the dad's like "well there's a clutch... and you got the gas pedal..."

I really wish I could find that film again, it had stoner comedy vibes


Edit: It might be Mom and Dad Save the World (1992) though I can't find the scene where they ask the dad how the car / space ship works

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Alien: thank wha... 😬 umm we'll come back later.

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago

"DOG, I said thank dog!...if you are leaving then, please, take me with you. PLEASE. It's such a fucking shit show here.
I...I will let you probe me. Please don't leave me here!"

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago
[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

"We shall not waste our time with thy 'woke libs,' earthlings. We shall speak to the one who did his own research."