While agree that words should have meanings, he definitely still was nearly 40 and apparently preferring the company of a 17 year old. Not a pedo by the evidence presented, ok, but that ice is thin.
That's not thin ice. Paedophiles are attracted to prepubescent children, i.e., below the age of 13. Here's where the ice is at its thinnest to diagnose someone as a paedophile, while ethically one is already submerged of course, when acted upon. It's obviously not to be taken lightly with traumatic life-changing consequences when indulged. This is why it's important to not throw terms around ignoring their meaning. People who actually are born with this condition should find ways to get psychological help to prevent it manifesting into reality. Irresponsibly throwing reputation destroying terms around causes people not to communicate, to suppress, and in the worst cases to satisfy their urges in secret which in turn increases the most wicked forms of suffering.
The aforementioned conditions are not at all present in Seinfeld-Lonstein's case, where context matters. Here's a quote from a book I'm reading which is an apt litmus test to decide if any relationship is weird or not.
“I spent Saturday evening at Leonberg. In Lisa [Remppis] I’ve found a person I can love wholeheartedly. Don’t misunderstand me, though. I realize Lisa’s half a child still, and I’m not depriving her of her childishness. I can’t philosophize with her.” ―Hans Scholl, At the Heart of the White Rose: Letters and Diaries of Hans and Sophie Scholl
Judging from the sources I've read Shoshanna and Jerry were able to talk to each other without one manipulating the other. While it's statistically more unlikely considering their indeed unusual age gap, it does happen. They had a relationship for four years, so clearly it seems she was fine with it. Conversely, I've seen people in their thirties talk to each other where one was clearly dumbing themself down when talking to their significant other, which seemed quite weird.
TL;DR: there's a night and day difference between actual indulging paedophiles who cause human trafficking and unimaginable suffering/death, and haphazardly being attracted to someone in their late adolescence. Conflating the two does the victims and the justice system a disservice. The former belongs to the most horrible forms of human depravity, while the latter, well, doesn't. If one needs to manipulate another to form a connection, then it is ethically wrong regardless of age.
Trying to get to someone's definition before arguing is the opposite of obtuse. Although that does make it sound like Jordan Peterson, yikes.