politics
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Next up: Unsolicited call to the Pope to determine how much he'd need to donate to make it to heaven.
"...and, and, and, get this: I got Nobel Peace Prize coming in any minute now! It's in the bag!"
"Hmm, that's not what I hear."
Papel Indulgence are a thing. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indulgence
Ohh yeah it is. Confession is also a hotline to low-key blackmail.
"Come on down to 'Honest Epstein's House of Confessions,' where nobody will record your confessions for future blackmail purposes, we promise.🤞 Ask about our 'Special Services' for discreet wealthy men."
Were a thing, and if Sky Daddy is real his mercy definitely isn't for sale. He might double smite you for asking though.
Not enough smiting going on.
Religion is 80% marketing, 20% helping the community. The Sky Cake is a lie, but it does get some good things done.
Unfortunately it does just as much harm, if not more.
80% harm, 20% good
Mobsters like Capone and Escobar always do lots of community outreach, so what? That 80% should be good works. Why don't churches use their vast treasure to give free health care to the citizens? Or free college?
I'd say the same thing about the mafia, though 20% good might be a stretch.