this post was submitted on 16 Dec 2025
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[–] NullPointerException@lemmy.ca 106 points 3 days ago (5 children)

Why would Santa need two separate tables for this?

[–] spiffpitt@lemmy.world 144 points 3 days ago (1 children)

don't underestimate database design in production environments

[–] phorq@lemmy.ml 39 points 3 days ago

Exactly, Santa's always watching and audit logs get complicated

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 99 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (6 children)

I would make two separate views. 

CREATE VIEW NiceList AS
 SELECT * FROM Children
  WHERE behavior = 'nice' 
   AND parent.income > 40000; 
CREATE VIEW NaughtyList AS
 SELECT * FROM Children
  WHERE behavior = 'naughty'; 
[–] NullPointerException@lemmy.ca 64 points 3 days ago

The income is a nice touch.

[–] criss_cross@lemmy.world 26 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The poor kids can’t even afford coal and fall through the cracks.

[–] laurelraven@lemmy.zip 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Only the nice ones, the naughty poor children get free coal

[–] naeap@sopuli.xyz 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

The poor nice ones get beaten by the naughty rich ones.

[–] KairuByte@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Why are we using magic strings for behavior?

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 28 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Feel free to fork my comment. 

[–] Tja@programming.dev 11 points 2 days ago

Does Santa accept PRs?

[–] TheOctonaut@mander.xyz 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's an ENUM and other people have to read this fucking codebase too, Brian!

[–] Olap@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I've a DBA who would insist on this being in a dimension table and using a foreign key constraint instead of just a fucking string

[–] luciferofastora@feddit.org 5 points 2 days ago

I like your DBA!

Users probably don't.

[–] djmikeale@feddit.dk 10 points 2 days ago

He used to have an is_nice bool but consultants convinced Santa it isn't future proof enough to capture the nuances of kids behaviour in today's world, such as "nice but always is really smug about it". But the consultants kept making PowerPoints instead of updating the backend, so now Santa also has added a new value to behaviour: "consultant-like"

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 5 points 3 days ago

Omitted for brevity. 

[–] menas@lemmy.wtf 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

which default currency shall santa use ? Dollar have no sense, if presents are free. However Yuan may ease things with providers.

[–] joyjoy@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 days ago

He's in the north pole, so probably Canadian dollars, Russian rubles, or Danish krone (Greenland) 

[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago

stop static “variables”! use COL. congress should do the same for setting minimum wage. eg parent.income > COL

[–] luciferofastora@feddit.org 14 points 2 days ago

Legacy system. Someone once started curating two spreadsheets for each year because they didn't know better. They had different formats too, because the naughty one listed separate entries for each naughty deed and a column describing it. Whenever they added something to that list, they manually checked and deleted the kid from the nice list.

Eventually, the amount of children they're responsible for got too large, so they learned some basic SQL and built themselves a database. To import the legacy lists and keep their workflow, they built separate tables. Just be glad they eventually learned how to filter by year and stopped creating new schemas for every year.

[–] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Relational database. He's got children, which joins to naughty and nice on childid and both record their status each year so that he can monitor trends.

[–] chocrates@piefed.world 6 points 3 days ago

Once you get a few thousand columns wide you create a naughty_list2 for the new data