this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2026
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[–] Staden_@pawb.social 80 points 4 days ago (24 children)

"I don't understand trans people. Why would you have a problem with the gender you were given at birth? If I was born a woman I wouldn't want to transition into a man"

- me before I realized I was trans

[–] craftrabbit@lemmy.zip 7 points 4 days ago (12 children)

That's literally me right now. I cannot imagine what someone must feel for them to transition and how they might feel because of the transition (though can obv appreciate and accept that some have those feelings I can't directly relate to).

I don't know, I genuinely feel like it wouldn't change that much about my life. Even if the things I want and do stay the same, I feel like I could do those the same way no matter my gender. What does my gender even change about my life? Is gender even real?

[–] zikzak025@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Definitely something to be said about how gender isn't "real," but people's perception of it is.

There's no pattern of masculine or feminine behavior/style that is consistent across cultures and throughout history. It's all arbitrary.

But that binary perception of masculine/feminine is nevertheless all around us, even if it's not consistently represented.

I'd like to think that not much would change about my style or mannerisms if I had been born with different parts, and I find it odd how unnecessarily gendered so many aspects of society are. I'm just "me," what else would I want to be? But I also need to remind myself that I only think that way because I've never had to worry about being seen as something other than what I am, even if I don't feel that strongly about it. It's easy to overlook just how much of my life experience has been colored by my effortless gender presentation.

Not everyone gets that by default, and it's hard to put myself in those shoes because I simply can't understand what it's like to be viewed as the opposite gender, or why it might cause discomfort.

If I were airlifted to some other culture that viewed pants as feminine and skirts as masculine, would I toss all of my jeans to conform? I'd like to think I wouldn't, because I like the comfort of pants and attributing a gender standard to clothes has always seemed silly to me. But if it affected the way people saw me, I just might.

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