this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2025
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I'm going Orange. I feel like all of the others would naturally follow.

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[–] exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 6 days ago (2 children)

"Albanian Transporter" would be a pretty sick nickname of an assassin whose movements seem to defy the laws of physics.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

Sounds like a perverse sex move to me.

[–] ulterno@programming.dev 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

The problem being that if your are out of the country (and you can't teleport back to anywhere else), you now need to explain to the authorities how you managed to get in without a movement record.

Although it might be useful if you are a local and just need to dodge a bullet or escape a mugging by random teleportation.

[–] Aljernon@lemmy.today 13 points 6 days ago

Obviously I'm teleporting to Albania.

[–] Tedesche@lemmy.world 9 points 6 days ago

If I could teleport other people into a Tool music video, this wins hands down.

[–] Sunflier@lemmy.world 7 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

The black teleport one. You rob a bank and then teleport away so you can't be tracked? The means of escape is usually how they track you down. So, suddenly being able to teleport thousands of miles in a moment?

Also, it'd be really useful for interstellar stuff. You only need enough fuel, food, and air to go one way. Strap me onto the rocket to Mars! I'd even hop back with huge sacks of Mars rocks to give to NASA. We've figured out the trek to Mars, its the getting back that's been the problem.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

What would you even do with it?

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 9 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

Impress my dates, of course!

"Look at this, babe" *arm turns purple*

"Oh god..."

"I know. You wait and see what else does that! ;)"

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Red, can I also change each eye to a different colour?

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 6 days ago

Sure, why not, go crazy.

[–] Cattail@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago

The Cantonese speaking dog is pretty cool. I like the Albania teleporting till I realized I need to get out of Albania

[–] gerryflap@feddit.nl 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Uhmmmm can I also teleport back from Albania? If so, then sure. I hate travelling so I never really go far, being able to go to Albania and back at the blink of an eye would be chill. Going for a nice lunch walk and then teleport back. Otherwise I'll go with the eye colour I guess, the rest is useless.

[–] seejur@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

Maybe I'm reading it wrong, but it's a one way ticket?

[–] tgirlschierke@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

There's a lot of room for interpretation with purple, but 80 million people speak Cantonese. I would be a fool not to take it.

[–] ulterno@programming.dev 1 points 6 days ago

Nice.
Now good luck teaching the dog to understand your language. It's brain is already overloaded.
And you'll now have to learn Cantonese too, to understand what it is saying (better than no language though).

[–] Dvixen@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago

Red. My eye colour already changes randomly, although less often and more subtly than it did when I was younger.

I'd love to be able to control it and confuse people.

[–] Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago

Eye color. Though the five dollarydoos are tempting.

[–] Tier1BuildABear@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I can get a dog I can talk to with a translator app? Hell yeah

[–] BobbyGasoline@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Right?I will learn Cantonese to be able to talk to my dog.

[–] bstix@feddit.dk 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Your dogs says: Bow wow wow yippie yay yippie yo.

[–] BobbyGasoline@lemmy.world 2 points 5 days ago

Now that I think about it, Im the spare human. They would just speak to me like if they were the protagonists in a 1970's Kung Fu movie and Im Pai Mie. "Filthy Ape! Once I defeat you, I will sleep next to mother, and you will sleep in hell! I would also like to be let out...."

[–] W3dd1e@lemmy.zip 4 points 6 days ago

DOG. Always dogs. More dogs. I want to pet all the dog.

[–] nurunuru@leminal.space 3 points 6 days ago

australians rise up

[–] NauticalNoodle@lemmy.ml 3 points 6 days ago

people dig green eyes.

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 124 points 1 week ago (10 children)

Black one for sure. You could get away with some amazing heists/pranks/achievements.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 71 points 1 week ago (12 children)

And they'll be waiting for you in Tarana Albania, every time.

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[–] justdaveisfine@piefed.social 95 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Red.

Simply say "oh, its a full moon tonight?" Then look at them with your now piercingly red eyes and state "I must leave, immediately."

Get out of any social situation and you can get your friends to think you're hiding some big secret. Win win.

[–] myster0n@feddit.nl 43 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Or "don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry" while turning your eyes green

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[–] marcos@lemmy.world 60 points 1 week ago (6 children)

And teleport back back, right?

... Right?

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[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 57 points 1 week ago

One time I was in Spain and I found 5 Australian dollars on the floor in a train station. I picked it up and pocketed it. The same day, I climbed a bell tower in some museum/remains and was chilling up there for half an hour, without anybody else coming up. Eventually another person came up and said hi. Recognised they were Australian so I asked them if they wanted 5 dollars and they said "....yeah?" And I gave it to them. No explanation.

I laugh sometimes thinking of the story from their perspective, climbing a Spanish bell tower and meeting an English guy at the top who hands them 5AUD, like a NPC in an RPG.

[–] Meron35@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Pink, because then you can fold Queen Elizabeth II into a whale giving head

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