this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2025
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Funny

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[–] xxce2AAb@feddit.dk 31 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"The proper authorities have directed me to instruct you to immediately cease breathing, as it has been determined that you're wasting precious oxygen with deplorably low return on investment. I'd offer my condolences to your loved ones, but that'd be asinine since we both know you haven't got any."

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 11 points 2 weeks ago

The very molecules that comprise your being would be better put to use as the poop in my rectum

[–] Klear@quokk.au 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It's amazing you can type with your boxing gloves!

[–] egrets@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

I might be too dense for this - is it a joke about traumatic brain injuries? (I'm not being snide!)

[–] orenj@lemmy.kde.social 10 points 2 weeks ago

Callback to Strongbad, a fictional character who had a little side-show where he answered emails in boxing gloves to stay on-model.

[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

IDK, the limiting factor for me is time, not my ability to read. Not every email is as necessary, important, or time-sensitive as the sender thinks it is, and some days I also gotta do other shit that isn't responding to emails.