I manage all my services with systems. Simple services like kanidm, that are just a single native executable run baremetal with a different user. More complex Setups like immich or anything that requires a pzthon venv runs from a docker compose file that gets managed by systemd. Each service has its own user and it's own directory.
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What is your setup? I have TrueNAS and there I use the apps that are easy to install (and the catalog is not small) and maintain. Basically from time to time I just come and update (one button click). I have networking separate and I had issues with Tailscale for some time, but there I had only 4 services in total, all docker containers and all except the Tailscale straight forward and easy to update. Now I even moved those. One as a custom app to TrueNAS and the rest to proxmox LXC - and that solved my tailscale issue as well. And I am having a good time. But my rule of thumb - before I install anything I ask myself if I REALLY need this, because otherwise I would end up with like a jillion services that are cool, but not really that useful or practical.
I think what I would recommend to you, find platform like TrueNAS, where lots of things is prepared for you and don't bother too much with the custom stuff if you don't enjoy. Also I can recommend having a test rig or VM so that you can always try first, if its easy to install and stable to use. There were occasions when I was trying stuff and it was just bothersome, I had to hack stuff and I was glad in the end I didn't "pollute" my main server with it.
I find the overhead of docker crazy, especially for simpler apps. Like, do I really need 150GB of hard drive space, an extensive poorly documented config, and a whole nested computer running just because some project refuses to fix their dependency hell?
Yet it’s so common. It does feel like usability has gone on the back burner, at least in some sectors of software. And it’s such a relief when I read that some project consolidated dependencies down to C++ or Rust, and it will just run and give me feedback without shipping a whole subcomputer.
Trying to get peertube installed just to be able to organize my video library was pain.