Waaaaaay too fast. Give me a dozen of your slowest men and some box graters. We'll get through them eventually
this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2026
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Flippanarchy
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easy fix. don't use the motor, just hook it up to some bicycles and reduction gears
"Men, you're lucky men. Soon you'll all be fighting for your planet. Many of you will be dying for your planet. A few of you will be forced through a fine mesh screen for your planet. They will be the luckiest of all."
Technology has advanced somewhat since the French Revolution.
Greed too
How did you get a copy of my 2028 presidential platform!?
Volunteered at the Pistcow/TotallyNotJessica 2028 campaign headquarters in Schenectady.
Mark in Outreach said it was ok to distribute π€·
TNJ for ~~Vice~~ President!
How do you throw them in genitalia-first though?
Very carefully.
Also: with lots of practice
Soylent Green is people.
The machine of liberty must occasionally feed on the bones, flesh, and blood of tyrants. It hungers.
Nah nah nah, death is the easy way out, they need to β¨sufferβ¨ for what they did.
So? Just put 'em in feet first and use the slowest speed on the grinder.
Wow. Wow. This seems unnecessarily cruel ...I like it. Carry on.
Itβs necessary
Right? Like I'm so close to climax!
Just turn down the speed and put them in feet first.
edit: Shit, someone already said that, downvote this.
Edit II: You mother fuckers.
To shreds you say..
And their accomplices?
To shreds you say...
Please hold a moment and consider the poor fuck who will have to clean up!
Traditional head removal options are much cleaner and i would argue quicker.
Do it in the woods and it will be fertilizer
Just make the next ones in line clean it out. When we don't have any more next ones, we won't need to clean it up anyway. Leave it as a monument to what happens when you do that shit.
If weβre entertaining this fantasy future, I imagine it would not be cleaned and would end up in a museum somewhere.
Sprayed with epoxy or something to seal in the smelly gunk, I imagine. Gotta immortalize the pedo bits for future generations.
No need to clean it up. Just let it sit there, ready to go in case anyone else gets any funny ideas.
Just hose it down afterward. Make sure the run-off makes it to one of their insulated communities. Maybe some Lysol spray as well.
Biodiesel
Prove it!
There are a lot of them.
We may need more than a couple of those things.
The guillotine of the 21st century!
Generational problems call for modern solutions!
As a Risk of Rain 2 player, I want to throw some drones and gun turrets into this to recycle them
I got $50 to help buy one.
Yeah... If we all chip in...
I can't think of anything else that would help the economy and society and world peace as much.
I just got my tax refund
I'd prefer to treat Epstein vacationers in a humane and ethical manner, as we would any living creature. The abattoir will use a bolt gun to the skull to render them unconscious. Then we'll drain the blood from their venous system, and send the carcass off for further processing. Ideally a composting facility.
I believe OPβs solution also results in compostable output.