Good ol' American magic
this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2026
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Zoltraak-47
I ain't got time to expelliamus.
I’ll expel your ass, nerd!
Don't threaten me with a good time!
Accio gun
Given a choice between what's canonical and what's cannonical, I know which one I'm picking.
Obligatory Classic: Harry Potter with Guns
The best part is, that it's not just a trailer, but the entire film was edited like this
Ha, nice. I'll have to try to find the full copy to go along with my copy of Wizard People, Dear Reader.
That one sounds a bit like the German "Harry Potter und ein Stein"
Hahah, the scene where he opens his inheritance vault with all the bullets. Man, thanks for the laugh
Opening with Dumbledore just shooting out the lights.
Dumbledore fired calmly.
Harry Dresden goes to Hogwarts.
I'd watch Harry Dresden: Wizard College
Expect a projectile motherfucker!
I'd more likely expect somebody sitting on his ass 5m behind the place where he was when pulling the trigger looking stupid and holding his forearm. I've seen smartasses firing regular machine guns like this. No matter how strong you think you are - It just doesn't work.
Goddammus sexualis tyrannosaurus! 🪄💦🥾
As funny as this is, there is some bull crap reason in the books explaining that muggle devices tend to not work well when close to places with too much magic
Revolvers would work, surely. There's zero electronics and an extremely simple internal mechanism. If door hinges work, so should revolvers
Artillery it is then.
Percy Jackson did this so much better by explaining only imperial gold or celestial bronze can be used to craft weapons that could harm powerful entities.
So naturally some dude loaded celestial bronze bullets into his warplane's (probably .50 cal M2) machine guns lol
If I recall that was just electronics no?
Like we've seen them use fire at hogwarts. Simple chemical reactions still occur. That's all a gun is, a spark, gunpowder, and a tube. Frankly this is just potions class
Yeah, its all mechanical. Put a machine gun up in one of the towers 
and when Voldermort and the gang roll up in a nice tidy group open up.
Malfoy: 
So there's this game called Arknights, which is set in a universe where they didn't figure out the gunpowder, but they gave rocks that can be used to fuel the magic (and also give you magic rock cancer, go figure). So they have guns, but they're basically only usable by one race of characters that are known for their innate talent for precise magic control, and everyone else sticks to crossbows and ballistas, or else more traditional magic.
This made me think about what would make a magic gun in the setting superior to a regular gun. Assuming it's just more powerful it shouldn't make much difference since everyone is just running around with a wand that can kill someone at will anyways. In the case of the weird wand connections that I barely remember even happening outside of one scene in the books (and more often in the films) I suppose it would be useful.
The main advantage of a gun would seem that it is instant (no incantation, just aiming) and could probably be silenced.
Rate of fire, accuracy, range, and additional bullshit. Most of the limitations on fire arms are due to material science, weight, or just keeping it clean for example a lot of MGs have overheat issues with continuous fire, heavier rifles weigh a lot, and caseless firearms are stupidly complex making them prone to failing due to dirt build up for example.
Mind you this depends on the settings limitations but something as simple as a cooling rune on an MG42 turns into from the huns buzzsaw into the huns sawmill since there would be at minimum reduced risk of barrel slag. You could have single soldiers treating M2 browning like fucking grease guns, weild .50 cal snipers like 1911s, or teleport ammo right into a Heckler & Koch G11 so as to never have to disassemble it to reload.
That's just what I can think of off the top of my head, if the setting allows you could probably create a magitech self charging lasgun from Warhammer 40k, so basically just an archeotech lasgun from 40k.
To quote Speaker D "This is because the metric for OH, FU- is three to six guys with shotguns hanging out somewhere they weren't expecting". This is a quote in relation to World of Darkness by the way.
This whole thing about wands being able to do basically the same as a gun also me realize that one could see the Harry Potter books as a group of kids with stun guns and gadgets fighting the idiot baddies who just use guns and can't get a single plan to go right because of some dumb bs.
I really like the way that The Dresden Files handles it.
Magic tends to fuck with precision mechanics and electrical systems, which means that modern weapons are much more likely to jam when in the presence of magic auras.
As a result, the main character, who is a wizard tends to use a .44 revolver as his sidearm because anything more precise is going to be unreliable.
Do you think "too much magic" can stand up to "too much MURICA?" I think not, good sir.
All he has to do is chant the spell "AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!"
Right, so no shotguns? Easy. Sniper rifles, no problem.
Step one would to be a wizard I guess, otherwise you'll never even find the castle and forgot what you were doing so you are just back to trying to find someone wanting to play corn hole
The gun is his patronus
"I ain't got time to bleed.."
"You got time to duck?"
Does USA ever even get acknowledged in the HP universe? I can't remember any instance of a yank showing up in any of the books or any reference to the North American continent.
"America...well...we magicked it away. It was full of Voldemorts."
The first Fantastic Beasts movie is set in New York, and it makes several appearances in the supporting lore books. Apparently, Americans don't really like Quidditch, preferring some sort of magical-explosions basketball-ish game. Jeez I wish Joanne weren't such an awful piece of shit human.
Gotcha. I left the franchise after Book 7 and its two movies. I've watched maybe 15 minutes of one of the FB movies (maybe the second one?) while on an overnight flight and was immediately lost and not entertained enough to commit, especially when Forrest Gump was an alternative option.
The first movie of Magical Beasts and Where to Find Them takes place in the US. Otherwise mentions are minimal, if any, in the HP series.
avahduh kedahvrah you mothefucker
"Expecto patron-"
just fucking riddled with bullets
Time to whip out the old muggle wand
I like how Misfits and Magic handles this where wizards straight just have never heard of nuclear weapons.
"Aveda cad..." BANG.
The end.
Jesse "The Body" Ventura. The former governor of Minnesota.
What would be his name?
John Brown, if he's fighting to free house elves.
John Browning, if he's going after death eaters.
Oh and it's Rowling, so to be extra on the nose, John would have a brown skin tone
@django@discuss.tchncs.de
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