We once made a fake DVD-cover for a friend's birthday where we all played different action movie stars. I was Steven Seagal.
I'm not proud to say that I still have the body to be his double.
this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2026
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You're not out of shape. You're a dedicated cosplayer.
If you had a torso like that you wouldn't have the energy to turn the whole thing, either.
Holding a VR gun is easier when the gun isn't actually two separate devices you have to hold as if they were a single rigid structure. That's why I taped my controllers to a stick.
What kind of stick?
Any of these would do:
Fatly going around corners
"moves fatly around the corner"
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sniper_Special_Ops
Thanks, now I know which dumb movie I'm watching later. 3/10 on IMDB and I have a feeling they were being generous.
If you do, I could recommend a spicy but really unconventional twist on it. A lot of shitty movies like this have Wikipedia plot summaries that are lacking, inaccurate in small ways, etc. Watching it for the sake of reviewing and possibly revising that summary is a kind of perverse joy that feels impossible to sell to someone who's never tried.
For example, I rewrote the summary for Whiteout (2009 film), and it was way more fun than just watching it straight. Noticing every stupid fucking detail and how hard it was to actually turn the bullshit plot into a coherent summary was enriching in a way that's hard to describe.
I'll save that for a day filled with more self-hatred but I like the idea. Similar to representing an obviously guilty client in court.
Similar to representing an obviously guilty client in court.
y e s
It's so much fun becoming an expert on random, shitty movies where the stakes are so low. Maybe you need to be a certain type; I don't know.
For an action movie star he sure sits a lot
It took me until the second play to realize what was wrong. What was he thinking??
thinking
Bold assumption.
Hey it might be bad but at least he's up and moving here.
He could be wheeled around... We don't see his legs.
To be fair, he hasn't seen his legs in a while either.
Looks like Seagull thinks he's carrying the world's tiniest bazooka...