justlookingfordragon

joined 2 years ago
 
3
mindblowing (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by justlookingfordragon@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world
 

EDIT: direct upload so viewers don't have to rely on imgur ;) I wasn't aware that this is an issue, but luckily it is an easy fix .. and that you for letting me know.

 
0
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by justlookingfordragon@lemmy.world to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
 

Longer, better version with sound: https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=hK45ZscEolM (thanks to @Jessica@discuss.tchncs.de for the link!)

~~Direct link in case the post doesn't work as intended~~: https://i.imgur.com/ZW8rLSM.mp4

 

In case the direct link doesn't work properly: https://i.imgur.com/GM7051z.mp4

 

Direct link just in case the other one doesn't work: https://i.imgur.com/DpcYyFQ.mp4

 

(shamelessly stolen from imgur - I'm not the OP)

 

... and if you don't know I'm not going to explain it.

 

(shamelessly stolen from an imgur dump)

"Fun" Fact: that chart isn't even a joke - it is actually, factually, pretty accurate. You can get a prison sentence of up to 3 years for that particular gesture.

Gemäß § 86a Absatz 1 und 2 StGB ist es nicht erlaubt, nationalsozialistische Symbole, Grußformeln oder Parolen zu verwenden. Der Hitlergruß wird [...] mit bis zu drei Jahren Freiheitsstrafe geahndet

...on the other hand, it is a wonderful piece of irony that a joke about Germans turns out to be a non-joke in disguise, lol. German humor is no laughing matter, after all!

=P

1
Know your shits! (i.imgur.com)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by justlookingfordragon@lemmy.world to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
 

(Shamelessly stolen from an imgur dump, but I felt like it belongs here)

Edit:

Since so many of you suggested additions, I'm just going to list them all in one place. Let's create a community-made enzycrapedia of shit-related terms and phrases!

Transcription of the image in case the picture disappears:

  • Dogshit: Very poor quality

  • Bullshit: Not true

  • Horseshit: Nonsense

  • Apeshit: rambunctious

  • Batshit: insane

  • Chickenshit: coward

  • Ratshit: poor quality

  • No shit: obviously (also sometimes "No shit, Sherlock!" as an exclamation)

  • Holy shit: mind blowing / unbelievable

  • Hot shit: very good

  • Dipshit: a total dumbass

  • Tuff shit: take it or leave it. (correct spelling would be "tough shit")

  • Jack shit: nothing

  • The shit: perfection

More shit:

  • Cut the shit: knock it off.

  • Are you shitting me: are you serious.

  • This shit is bananas: this is crazy.

  • That’s my shit: I really like that.

  • I dig that shit: I love it

  • Shit!: An exclamation of discontent. See also: fuck.

  • I shit myself: I pooped my pants.

  • Shit-Hawk: unpleasant person

  • For shits and giggles: Doing something silly for no particular reason

  • Shit a brick: to be scared

  • Scared shitless: being really scared

  • Shitstain: someone trashy or worthless

  • Shit for brains: stupid

  • Shit sandwich: a shitty situation

  • Shithead: a shitty person

  • Shithole: a shitty place

  • Piece of shit: a shitty thing

  • Deep shit: a meaningful revelation

  • To be up shit creek (without a paddle): to be in deep trouble

  • To be full of shit: constantly lying

  • Shit Stirrer: someone who deliberately causes problems/arguments

  • Get your shit together: to organize stuff properly (alternatively; to calm down)

  • Losing your shit: freaking out

  • To [do] the shit out of something: doing something in an excellent way

  • I don't give a shit: I don't care

  • When shit hits the fan: when an already bad situation suddenly becomes worse

  • Shit happens: bad things happen and you can't do anything about it

  • Shit just got real: Something dangerous is happening right now

  • Does a bear shit in the woods?: Isn't it obvious?

  • Eat shit: To fall on your face

  • Shit-eating grin: a smug and condescending expression

  • Who shit in your cereal?: Who ruined your day/mood?

  • (To watch the) Shitshow: watching utter chaos unfold without intervening

  • A metric shit ton: a lot

  • Shit on a Shingle: a dish consisting of a cream sauce with meat in it poured over toast

  • Nuttier than squirrel shit: being crazy

  • Shitstorm: a stressful, chaotic situation

  • You don't know shit: you're clueless

  • Don’t shit where you eat: Don’t date a work colleague

  • The shits: diarrhea

  • My shit: my stuff

  • Shitter: toilet

  • You are shit: you're worthless

  • You are not shit: reassuring that you're NOT worthless

  • You ain't shit: you're worse than worthless

Thanks and credit to: Poopmeister, Wogi, protist, cloudy1999, lambchop and ToRa

view more: next ›