this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2026
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[–] Maestro@fedia.io 211 points 1 month ago (19 children)

Aside from a lot of guys being thickheaded and not seeing it, there's also selection bias.

A) A girl has a crush on a guy. He notices but plays it safe. Maybe she's just friendly. Result: no harm done except perpetuating the myth that guys don't notice.

B) A girl is just friendly but the guy thinks he's being crushed on and acts on it. Now he's forever labeled as a creep.

The only safe play as a guy is always, always assuming she's just being friendly. Unless she comes right out and says she wants to hump your bones, just assume she's being nice to you.

[–] hoshikarakitaridia@lemmy.world 64 points 1 month ago (7 children)

Thanks for lining it out so well.

There's a good shot that she's into me, but if she's not, I'll either die of embarrassment or I'll get bullied by their whole social circle.

Add to this that men usually are not as socially comfortable as women, and you kinda understand it why this happens.

[–] angrystego@lemmy.world 22 points 1 month ago (6 children)

This happens to women too. The embarrasement is real and the societal pressure to not be seen as a slut is everpresent. Playing it safe is a popular strategy no matter the gender.

[–] hoshikarakitaridia@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Oh yeah most definitely.

I just wrote this because these memes are rampant and funny, but they do make light of a bad circumstance on our society. And that trope usually targets men, so here's some context.

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