this post was submitted on 19 Mar 2026
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In my experience, having a constant companion has a positive feedback loop. People you can continuously interact with - joking, catching up, eating together, helping one another out, just Netflix'n'Chilling... it's reaffirming.
But it is a loop. You don't just wake up happy forever. There's ups and downs. There's psychical and emotional adjustments. You're not immune to despair. You just have someone you can be glum around who - ideally - fills you in on the lows and rides with you for the highs.
If you've got a bunch of mental baggage going into a relationship, your partner (ideally) helps you unpack that shit and dispose of it. Or, at least, shows you their own baggage, so you know you're not alone. It doesn't just go away instantly, but over time you can put it behind you precisely because you've got someone else in your life affirming your own worth.
I agree with all that, but I'll also say that getting started fixing your issues first is a hugely valuable thing. If you haven't it's so easy to think love will solve all your problems while not even having the tools to deal with your own emotions and baggage.
You need people, we all do, and we deteriorate rapidly without people. But romantic relationships are really easy to screw up by being emotionally unhealthy