Fuck AI

Thank you! Of course, there are numerous people I did support and many other who are/were there right now. It's priceless and radiates with good, awesome beliefs that someone got their issue solved and moved forward.

Yet, the thought that people who do not know the whole story, and just saw "banned"/"K-lined" will always remember that and do not consider/value your contribution at all, and the operators won't even care about you anymore. Since everyone has their own beliefs and time available.

There was an operator (who's name starts with letter K), who is an operator anymore, banned me 3 times in a row, in the #linux channel. It was in ~2020, and people remind me and share about it in another channels ruining my reputation to the point no one considers me serious. Yet, no one even asked me once, why the operator banned me in the first place. And you know why? Because they didn't like my name! My name was "Artfaith", and they put it to the reason of the ban itself! How is that alright? No one even thinks about it, and what they see is "banned".

It makes sense the person is not an operator anymore, or not even joined to the channel the last I checked, but my reputation is ruined. Just 2 months ago, I was arguing with a person in channel #web regarding their questionable approach to library/dependency handling in programming, and shared my experience that would improve theirs current setup. And what you think? A person from #linux comments on my contribution out of the blue saying that I should not be trusted because I was banned multiple times. I start to arguing about it, called operators telling I get defamed, and bang, I am banned again...

I added people who troll me or ruin my presence in /ignore, but it did not help, because they start ruining my reputation behind my back, and it happened a lot, when someone highlights me in chat in a question to that ignored person, and what I see: "Oh. Yeah, they are a bad person then. I won't listen to them, too."

It's more than a decade, and I neither nickname change nor discussion helped... Some channels prohibit alternative accounts like Libera's IRC #linux, and that caused me to another trouble when I wanted to start from a blank canvas...

For another example of pure sadness that some Netop was actually waiting until I disconnect from Libera just to silently ban me, so that no one would see the "K-lined" message in their IRC clients! How sad is that...

EMail conversation excerpt

Yes, it looks like I am 16 years old, but I am almost 40. There's just so much I can do...

There's much to this of course, where I tried to stay calm, I was trying to agree with these bans, re-read rules multiple times, I was careful, and nothing helped. A single mistake or even a slightest of it - ban.
I was calm, silent, shouting, screaming, sending polite, impolite, and overly lovely, and rude messages, they are just indifferent and don't care. More to that, they just increased my ban to the year, just because I was not calm in the initial ban reason where I got K-lined from all channels, again, because I had issues in a single channel only.

This is all inhuman... this causes me dark feelings where I invested too much of time into this? Into knowing that the whole network sees me as someone I am even not? And don't want to hear me out throwing me like biomass? Is that modern, human attitude...?
These chats helped me to stay social, too, because I am physically mute since ~2012, due to an accident, and just a few know non-verbal languages out there...

At least, my job helps where I am less social, and just try focusing on the work instead...

My gracious sakes... I so hope... no one will ever experience this... it caused me suicidal feelings, and you call that fun? I supported numerous, shared my personal experience I get normally paid for, in military and programming.