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As for the patriarchy, yeah, that's the primary problem. My point is to primarily focus on the system(the patriarchy) as the problem, rather than people (men). After all, many women will perpetuate and even sometimes benefit from the patriarchy.

So this is really the source of my confusion when it comes to your response. How does one go about dismantling a hierarchical system without being critical towards the people who operate and reinforce the system?

To me that would be like saying yes chattle slavery is bad, but we shouldn't attack southern slave holders, after all plenty of northern cloth makers profit from cotton produced in the south.

separate the action from the actor to more accurately describe why the action is wrong as opposed to who is doing the wrong.

Sticking with my analogy, I don't think non slavers have to be explained that they are not at fault for the actions of slave holders. No one is claiming that labeling all male communication is mansplaining is okay.

inaccurate language by liberals and pop-philosophy in saying it's all men when confronted by those who didn't understand the point.

Again, i don't think we should be blaming the people making the allegory for the people who fail to realize the point. In most cases those who interpret it as "all men" are not making that claim in good faith.

Going back to my analogy, it would be like saying many white plantation owners also owned slaves, and having someone claim that I said all white people in the south were slavers.

to illustrate how dumb the rhetoric of attacking men is when considering the assumed premise of the rhetoric is pro-feminist = anti-men.

I think this argument only aids the people who are conflating criticism against men practicing misogyny as criticism against all men.

When dismantling a hierarchical system like the patriarchy, there will be people who operate and benefit from that system who feel attacked. While I agree that we shouldn't single out every male who vicariously benefits from the system(I am a male after all). I disagree that being critical towards individuals who actively work to reinforce that system is "anti-male". Hierarchical system are human constructs, and thus the individuals who perpetuate that construct are inseparable from them. You can't target the system without targeting the people who make and reinforce the system.