this post was submitted on 04 Aug 2026
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[–] Zak@lemmy.world 143 points 1 day ago (3 children)

You probably also guessed that the stripper isn't actually attracted to you.

[–] Triumph@fedia.io 84 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 47 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Sorry you had to find out this way.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 16 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

But the escort actually likes me, right?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 29 points 23 hours ago (2 children)
[–] jim3692@discuss.online 18 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Instructions unclear. My ford escort definitely hates me

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I'd hate you too if you were trying to clog up my tailpipe.

[–] mattyroses@lemmy.today 2 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

you need to focus! It's not time for a fiesta!

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

That's a joke I cannot afford to make...

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 5 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

I made her a loaf of sourdough bread and now I know her real name and home address. Did I mess up?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 6 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Idk depends on your next move methinks

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Do you think it would turn out the same way as that one time I married the stripper?

[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 1 points 7 hours ago (1 children)
[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

So a twenty-year marriage and a mortgage, got it

[–] orbituary@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I don't need attraction, just the illusion thereof.

[–] MangoCats@feddit.it 1 points 1 hour ago

Our neighbor the beat cop always said: "in the end, all they want is the right kind of friction."

[–] slacktoid@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 day ago

Maybe that's what's happening here too, the illusion of a pretty lady

[–] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 1 points 20 hours ago

I dont need my porn to be this realistic. I want some fantasy to.