this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2026
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I used dating apps on and off for the best part of 10 years when I was single I never got a single meaningful match. They simply do not work.
The point of the app isn't to get you dates, it's to get you to use the app so they can sell your data.
If you get into a relationship and delete the app, they've lost a customer.
The system only works with competition, but as we stopped enforcing anti trust and anti competitive laws in any meaningful way, the same company owns most of the sites, and is in a shittrust with the rest to all maximize revenue instead of competing.
You have to follow rules 1 and 2.
You do have to use them correctly. I know a lot of people who use them irresponsibly, who don’t have the emotional intelligence to understand how the experience is going to be different(and therefore manage their emotional expectations*), and who match with way too many people for basically nothing while denying others over trivial things.
*You should be very into people and they should be into you, but how crushes develop from online dates is simply fundamentally different. You will likely not get the same “oh my god who is that?!” moment from someone you’ve already spoken to and who you know already wanted to go on a date with you.