this post was submitted on 13 May 2026
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I'm nearly 5000 pounds. No wonder I have trouble getting out of bed in the morning.

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[–] DrBob@lemmy.ca 134 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

I recently dropped a lot of weight and went from almost 5000 pounds to one year. I can highly recommend it. It happened around the time I turned 60 pounds.

[–] BananaOnionJuice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's some weird multi dimensional sci-fi shit.

Quick, recalibrate the warp core matrix and modulate the deflectors, we're going in to one year.

[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

c/asslips is leaking

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 67 points 2 months ago

Fuck, I'm not even 60 and I'm already a year.

[–] Syndication@lemmy.today 49 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Ah, so this is the technology all these companies are so obsessed over. Yikes.

[–] chocrates@piefed.world 9 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It's fake, or has been fixed. Ai is still a bullshit machine regardless

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

the beauty of llms is you can ask them a question and never get the same answer twice.

[–] percent@infosec.pub 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's a hyperparameter that can be adjusted for consistency

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Ew. I don't want the llm to know about my poops, they're a Bristol 7

[–] percent@infosec.pub 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

🤔 I wonder if/when threads like these ever get trimmed out of datasets. Like, is your Bristol 7 now permanent AI knowledge?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I hope so. We should be filling up llms with poop

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[–] smiletolerantly@awful.systems 30 points 2 months ago (1 children)

"average 50-59 year old weighs 5000 pounds" factoid actually just statistical error. Average person weighs 150 pounds. Pounds Georg, who lives in a cave and weighs over 50000000000000000000000000 pounds, is an outlier adn should not have been counted.

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago
[–] Etterra@discuss.online 24 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Apparently if you get old enough then you'll have the density of a neutron star.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 5 points 2 months ago

Before time folds in upon itself and your weight becomes time, which becomes weight.

[–] pressanykeynow@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Not necessarily, who knows what size average Americans are.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 2 points 2 months ago

Hey, I only have the mass of 3 Neptunes, thank you very much.

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[–] Folstar@lemmus.org 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I just want to apologize, as this is largely my fault. There was a blowout clearance on Easter Candy and I went in all. Having gained 924 metric tons over the past few weeks, I'm throwing the averages way off.

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[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 14 points 2 months ago

Wow, I'm very below average for my age bracket; I feel much better about my weight now! Thanks, Gemini!

[–] Renat@szmer.info 14 points 2 months ago

Averange IQ of man is 2 litres.

[–] n4ch1sm0@piefed.social 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And this is what they're trying to replace the workforce with lmao

[–] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 months ago

They need to go all in on it before it can become good enough to be viable, so we'll get precedent that its not viable, and we can survive as peasants for another generation.

[–] Soulphite@reddthat.com 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'll be.. Doc was on to something... there definitely is something wrong with Earth's gravitational pull in the future.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Oh man! How old IS Doc??? He didn't just travel 1 year. He traveled 30 years! In both directions! Then he traveled 100 years!

[–] mechoman444@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

You can measure weight in spans of time? 🤔

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

In less than twelve parsecs.

[–] ijustliketrains@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You can measure wait in spans of time

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[–] el_twitto@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I weigh 1 year... how much is that in kilograms?

[–] jlow@slrpnk.net 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Whatever 69 pounds is in kg, apparently.

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[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

I forgot I cross-posted this and nearly logged back out when I saw 23 unread messages.

[–] Tiral@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (2 children)

At 42 I'm well under the average, hell yeah.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 3 points 2 months ago

If you weigh only 42 then you may want to bulk up...

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

You weigh 42 years? Damn

[–] crazycraw@crazypeople.online 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

is it because men, somehow in their 50s, are moved to a pseudo surface zone of Jupiter ?

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

I've decided I should go on a diet to bring my weight down to more like 10 or 11 months. Should only take a dozen pounds or so to pull it off.

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

r/anythingbutmetric

[–] Photonic@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I measured OP’s mom’s belly circumference and it said one light year

She seemed more like a heavy year to me, but who am I

[–] NeilNuggetstrong@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

You're apparently a photon, so your comment checks out. You're good to go

[–] Rivermoonwolf@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Hekate be praised! I'm undercover age! Finally!!!

[–] chunes@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

I too know how to press the f12 button

[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

ai literally is that bad

[–] Stefan_S_from_H@piefed.zip 3 points 2 months ago

That's €230.67

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 3 points 2 months ago

I'm below average, time to BULK UP!

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Another copy of this fake...?

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[–] Smaile@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 months ago

guess the poisons really setting in now.

[–] chode_tode@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I havent gone past 187 lbs and im 32...

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[–] k2r@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Never heard of weight maxing?

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