this post was submitted on 21 Jul 2026
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submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by avidamoeba@lemmy.ca to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
 

Opened AliExpress today and it greeted me with a promo for this face massager

top 20 comments
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[–] 5ha99y@lemmus.org 3 points 1 day ago

So blowing one out helps with removing mouth wrinkles... Well, guys, if you are interested in a wrinkleless look, you know what you need to do! Train the shrimp mode!

[–] Samsy@lemmy.ml 44 points 2 days ago

Wait, there is a free alternative, stepsister.

[–] RumorsOfLove@lemmy.dbzer0.com 43 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] avidamoeba@lemmy.ca 42 points 3 days ago

Like Nvidia DLSS 5.

[–] tacosanonymous@mander.xyz 20 points 2 days ago

Makes you more charming, beautiful, charming. lol

[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 46 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Needs a protein boost to work effectively..

Also, OP, why is the image link like 2 pages long? Do you want people to track you? 🤔

[–] avidamoeba@lemmy.ca 12 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Believe it or not, the link came from incognito tab. 😆

E: trimmed all the params, seems to still work.

[–] helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago

Incognito is only good for local privacy like clearing history when closed. Websites will still track everything, and through fingerprinting, there's a very good chance they still know its you.

[–] EmpathicVagrant@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I forget, where do you cut a link to remove the tracked bit?

[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

That partly depends on the site, but to keep it simple, if you're on Android, I highly recommend Léon URL cleaner app.

But I'll use two different forms of a YouTube link as examples of how it can be both simple and confusing..

You see that ?si=xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx shit, yeah that's their tracking data...

[–] zedgeist@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Basically, anything after the ?, unless there are search terms in there

[–] dbtng@eviltoast.org 16 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Well, this is sufficiently ridiculous to post ... but I must admit I don't entirely understand it.
Sure, there's a reference to sucking cock here. Got that.
But what is the device supposed to do? And why does it give you sideburns?

[–] mattreb@feddit.it 1 points 1 day ago

the meme is that, for some weird reason, Aliexpress is constantly pushing this product to the top of its homepage

[–] chris@l.roofo.cc 8 points 2 days ago

It's supposed to be a training device for your facial muscles. I'm not sure how you use it but it's supposed to tone your face.

[–] swab148@startrek.website 2 points 2 days ago

Slow transition into Rude Boy

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You know what else does that

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Not all of us have massively thick organs to help our responses remove their stretch marks like that. Plus if you get there too early 😉 😁, there's less benefit for her.

[–] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Just ask a friend with the proper tools! I am sure, you have someone to ask to lend you a tool.

I am sure, someone in your neighborhood has the right tool for the work. #supportYourNeighborhood #sharingIsCaring

[–] ddplf@szmer.info 3 points 2 days ago

I'm sexually attracted to Before use

[–] damnthefilibuster@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

It even fixes chapped lips!