Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 2 years ago

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works

204

Anon follows the rules (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 9 hours ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

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[–] Xerxos@lemmy.ml 1 points 20 minutes ago

I abstain from alcohol and tabaco, but sex is just too nice to abstain from.

[–] lefty7283@lemmy.world 14 points 2 hours ago

Having been with my wife since high school, the amount of time between “no fooling around” to “where are my grandchildren” was shockingly short.

[–] turkalino@sh.itjust.works 25 points 5 hours ago

My parents: cmon, why won’t you have a beer with us?

Also my parents when I grab a second beer later that night: Jesus fucking Christ you’re an alcoholic

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 60 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

"Dad, can I go to a party with my friends?"

"You gonna drink?"

"No."

"Do drugs?"

"No."

"Have sex?"

"No."

"Then why the fuck do you wanna go to a party?"

[–] oce@jlai.lu 18 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

What's the point of partying if not to poison your brain and infect your genitals.

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 13 points 6 hours ago

This is why we invented condoms.

The other two are a lot more difficult to do without damage or risk