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Lemmy Shitpost
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
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2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
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3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
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4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
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5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
"welcome! please have a sit"
I say βoccupado!β And Iβm not even Spanish
"Estoy Poopin!"
Works better to tell them you're embarrassed, or "embarazado" en espaΓ±ol π
No room at the Inn, Mary
Will you help me hide a body?
I usually shout "one minute", "just a moment" or "in here". For some reason people like to try the door again when i say "one minute", though.
"IT'S NOT FOR SALE"
"It's the REINFORCEMENTS! HUZZAH!"
I always say "come in" - no one has ever tried to come in. π
"Who's there?"
"No solicitors"
"I'm full"
No solicitorsβ
Lawyer turns red and openly shits themselves
"Come back with a warrant!"
OCCUPADO
Australian with a nyc accent??
Sorry babe Iβm flying solo today
"There's no door on this side, go around!"
"Cover charge is $10"
Occupied.
Fuq orf am shiten
"Nein! Ich habe farfrompoopen!"
farfrompoopen
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=farfrompoopen
A situation in which nature calls for you to visit the bathroom, yet you cannot perform the act of defecation.
"Come on in, I kept the seat warm for you"
"Our cheeks have shared the same seat. We are butt brothers."
"I am the gatekeeper! Are you the keymaster?"
I would like to share this timeless classic
<cassius_clay13> so I was with my friend bryan the other night in a bar
<cassius_clay13> well he got really drunk and said he was gonna puke
<cassius_clay13> so i helped him walk to the toilet
<cassius_clay13> all the stalls were occupied
<emoti_conartist> lol
<cassius_clay13> bryan is a rugby player... so a big guy
<cassius_clay13> so he fucking KICKS one of the stall doors open
<cassius_clay13> and there's this guy in there taking a shit
<emoti_conartist> hahahahahaha
<cassius_clay13> and bryan throws up ALL OVER HIM
<cassius_clay13> then (this is genius) bryan thinks 'oh shit... if i were taking a shit and someone came in and was sick all over me, i'd want to fuck him up... so i'd better hit him first'
<cassius_clay13> so he fucking SMACKS this guy in the face
<cassius_clay13> and runs away
<cassius_clay13> imagine being that guy... WORST NIGHT OUT EVER
Wow. Bryan sounds like a shit head. Good for him to keep stereotypes alive.
Just lads being lads, what a ledge π€
(The Lads on Tour movement needs to end fast)
"come in!"
All fun and games until your bluff gets called
It's no bluff
OCCUPIED!
But what's weird is that 99% of the time I have no idea what to say in any given situation, but this public restroom scenario just came naturally to me one day and still comes naturally to me every time. That's weird isn't it? Like I'm only comfortable & functional in the most uncomfortable situations π€¦πΌββοΈ
"Just a sec, I'm doing the paperwork!"
Occupied????
Occupado
Occupied. It's the default answer. Rest is people making a bigger issue out of something so simple.
Occupied
Ask them if they want to play battle shits?
If we're thinking of the same movie, those "British" accents were so bad that they've stuck with me for 20 years.
I saw the movie ONCE
THANK GOD, I NEED A WITNESS!
"STOP! STOP! YOU'RE MAKING IT GO BACK IN!!"
"Fuck off" making sure to shout it as loud as the knock.
Want some ?
Occupado