this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2026
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[–] Acid_Burn@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 1 day ago (5 children)

I still think it's wild that no one really talks about how the order of the books after the gospels is shortest to longest with Revalation (some truly crazy ass shit) tacked on at the end.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 1 day ago (4 children)

The best part, in my opinion, is the extra ending in Mark. This was the original ending, which is an absolute banger:

When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go to anoint Jesus' body. 2 Very early on the first day of the week, just after sunrise, they were on their way to the tomb 3 and they asked each other, "Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?"

But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away. 5 As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed.

"Don't be alarmed," he said. "You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. 7 But go, tell his disciples and Peter, β€˜He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.'"

Trembling and bewildered, the women went out and fled from the tomb. They said nothing to anyone, because they were afraid.

This is in later versions, likely because someone copying the text found the ending to be insufficient:

When Jesus rose early on the first day of the week, he appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had driven seven demons. She went and told those who had been with him and who were mourning and weeping. When they heard that Jesus was alive and that she had seen him, they did not believe it.

Afterward Jesus appeared in a different form to two of them while they were walking in the country. These returned and reported it to the rest; but they did not believe them either.

Later Jesus appeared to the Eleven as they were eating; he rebuked them for their lack of faith and their stubborn refusal to believe those who had seen him after he had risen.

He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned. And these signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands; and when they drink deadly poison, it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people, and they will get well."

After the Lord Jesus had spoken to them, he was taken up into heaven and he sat at the right hand of God. Then the disciples went out and preached everywhere, and the Lord worked with them and confirmed his word by the signs that accompanied it.

But remember, kids: the bible is all true and infallible and the word of god and whatever other crap they tell you.

Criticism aside, I'm a hardcore atheist and reading about the history of early christianity (first ~300 years) was absolutely fascinating and I'd recommend checking out the subject to others who oppose organized religion. Bart Ehrman would be a good starting point, though can you go down quite a rabbit hole beyond his writing. This might be a good jumping off point: How Jesus Became God

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Mine is when this guy, you know his name, hitched his ass to a tree and walked a mile.

[–] ceenote@lemmy.world 30 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

The part where Moses writes down his own death and funeral is also pretty trippy.

I also like how John keeps saying "BTW Jesus totally liked me more than the other disciples. Beloved, even."

[–] Ichiro_kun@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Well thats what happens when ur books gets updates faster than ur phone.. ;-)

[–] human@slrpnk.net 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I saw a movie several years ago (name below to avoid spoilers) that was "based on a true story" and involved two people stranded in a dangerous situation with no way to communicate with anyone. I watched this whole movie, invested in the characters and the story, and then at the end they died, bodies never recovered. I was so annoyed. I get that biopics take a lot of liberties, but how tf could they say anything but the first ten minutes were in any way "based on a true story"?

Tap for spoilerI think it was Open Water

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Never discovered*

Within the window of time for the movie

[–] TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 1 day ago (7 children)

My favorite part is how well it can be used to light a fireplace. Just tear out some pages, put some wood over it and light it. Secundair use is rolling paper when you've run out.

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

At hotels, rip out a random page in the middle. If anyone ever reads it they'll be super annoyed.

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I'm still annoyed that it has never been printed in two-ply

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[–] nao@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago

"This happend to me the other day" and then someone wrote it down.

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