this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] ElChinchilla@lemmy.world 8 points 51 minutes ago

This meme is pretty wildly accurate to my last pay negotiation. (Tried nicely for 1 year, ultimately had to quit for them to take me seriously, don't recommend doing this if you aren't ready and prepared financially.)

I had the 8 hour day package +1% bonus raise 9 hour 1.1% Until emails stop 2%

They opted for the cheapest. People are still confused months later why i stop responding at 3:01 PM.

[–] neidu4@piefed.social 14 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago) (1 children)

I actually offer a free tier for eligible corporations: 37.5 hours a week, and no extras. Just sign my ToS.

I will extract and sell your data. All your data.

[–] TheAristocrat@lemmy.world 2 points 36 minutes ago

Was your ToS 30 pages long, strictly legalese, and filled with confusing and questionable addendums?

[–] InFerNo@lemmy.ml 51 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

The middle option needs to be highlighted with a "most popular" text above it.

[–] Sintinium@lemmy.zip 8 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

And premium having a discount for x months

[–] InFerNo@lemmy.ml 5 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago)

Discount if you pay the year in advance, or higher monthly cost but can cancel when you want

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 30 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

You joke, but you're just describing contractors

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 13 points 16 hours ago (3 children)

Kinda, but usually you're sorta expected to put in your best effort for every billed hour regardless.

Instead of laying things out like this, what you can do is bill more hours (within reason) per hour worked to customers who pay less per hour. Gotta be careful with that though.

[–] StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world 9 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

I worked as a consultant for years and yeah, exactly this, and more! One thing knowledge-based consultants do is reuse old work but bill clients for a flat rate instead of hourly. It's less than paying for new work, but usually much more than the hourly cost if they were billed for just the time required to update the material.

I recycled old work constantly. For a well-paying, reasonable client, I'd sometimes only bill for the time required to update the work and comp the rest as a gift. Last minute, minor updates were free within reason.

Penny pinching, uncooperative clients paid full price and I'd bill the rush rate to the minute for last minute updates. On average, great clients paid less for work than the ones trying to strangle a deal out of me.

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 12 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

usually you're sorta expected to put in your best effort for every billed hour regardless

[–] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 5 points 15 hours ago

Naturally. But we don't tell our clients that :)

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago

That's a very dangerous game, especially compared to just finding a higher paying single job.

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 43 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

That's poop breaks per hour, mind you.

[–] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 19 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] solarvector@lemmy.dbzer0.com 59 points 21 hours ago

*unlimited email plan will automatically reduce throughput to 1 email/hr when weekly count exceeds 500

Yeah no I'm not putting an SLA on my GI tract. It will break when it wants to

[–] nutbutter@discuss.tchncs.de 122 points 23 hours ago (12 children)

400 emails per week is CRAZY

[–] inmate_p01135809@lemmy.world 62 points 23 hours ago (1 children)
[–] WhiteOakBayou@lemmy.world 21 points 21 hours ago (9 children)

Are you being facetious or do you actually have to interact with greater then 80 emails a day?

[–] zod000@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 38 minutes ago

I sometimes get that many, quite a bit more if I count all the emails I automatically mark as read and put in a folder.

[–] floquant@lemmy.dbzer0.com 26 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Some jobs really are email operator in a trenchcoat

[–] ElChinchilla@lemmy.world 1 points 25 minutes ago* (last edited 25 minutes ago)

I sell and buy things all day, average emails per day over the last 3 years is about 120. 120 does not count auto responses from my system which go into their own folder automatically. I just emptied those last week, but it was like 93,000 in that folder. Took about an hour to delete them

[–] NewNewAccount@lemmy.world 12 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

I send like two emails per day and it’s exhausting.

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[–] Fandangalo@lemmy.world 84 points 22 hours ago (5 children)
  • 48k
  • 96k
  • 192k

For those wondering

[–] Hawk@lemmy.dbzer0.com 45 points 21 hours ago (11 children)

Are annual salaries a typical US thing? Rarely see this here in Europe.

[–] NateNate60@lemmy.world 29 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (6 children)

Most desk jobs in the US are salaried. Salaries are quoted typically in annual terms, although payroll is processed typically fortnightly (meaning salary payments are transferred into your account every two weeks, usually on Thursday or Wednesday).

The US Bureau of Labour Statistics collects salary data across hundreds of job descriptions and reports this information regularly. Here are some median annual salaries (along with the monthly equivalent in euros) for various corporate jobs:

  • Human Resources Specialists: $75,940 (€5,500 monthly)
  • Buyers and Purchasing Agents: $77,710 (€5,630 monthly)
  • Budget Analysts: $91,640 (€6,640 monthly)
  • Market Research Analysts and Marketing Specialists: $78,760 (€5,710)
  • Paralegals and Legal Assistants: $62,890 (€4,560)
  • Lawyers: $159,670 (€11,580)
  • Securities, Commodities, and Financial Service Sales Agents: $78,660 (€5,700)
  • Real Estate Brokers: $73,220 (€5,810)
  • Billing and Posting Clerks: $48,500 (€3,520)
  • Secretaries and Administrative Assistants: $47,540 (€3,450)
  • Computer Systems Analysts: $105,850 (€7,670)
  • Network and Computer Systems Administrator: $99,130 (€7,190)
  • Software Developers: $135,980 (€9,860)

Some notes before comparing salaries:

  • Office workers work 40 hours per week, and lunch breaks are typically 1 hour. The most common working schedule is 09:00 to 17:00 with a 1 hour lunch break. Two weeks paid holiday is the minimum for most office workers, but three to four weeks is more common. Extra paid holiday is considered a bonus for loyalty. People who have worked for the company for a few years will gradually be given more.
  • Sick days in the US are protected by law, but unpaid. Some companies offer paid sick day policies, others do not and force you to use paid holidays if you want to be paid for those days.
  • Increasingly, companies offer 12 paid "floating holidays" per year which are used to cover public holidays. But there are only 11 public holidays leaving one extra to be used however the employee pleases. An employer that doesn't offer floating holidays will instead typically just pay the employee for those 11 public holidays.
  • Tax in the US is typically less than in Europe. A person making $100,000 annually would pay $13,200 in federal tax, and between $0 and about $10,000 in state tax, depending on where they live. The US also offers various tax credits and exemptions. For example, putting money into a retirement account means that the money deposited isn't counted as income.
  • The US, famously, does not have a taxpayer-funded healthcare system. Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and typically the employer pays for the majority of the cost. This ends up costing a few hundred dollars a month to the worker out of pocket for their family, typically.
  • Everyday expenses in the US tend to be cheaper than in Europe due to lower consumption tax. This also varies between US states, with sales tax (comparable to VAT) ranging from 0% to 10%. Sales tax over 10% is uncommon. 7-8% is typical.
  • Energy is cheaper in the US than in Europe. In my area, a gallon of Midgrade 89 gasoline, equivalent to Europe's 95 E10 petrol, costs $4.50 per gallon (€0.96 per litre), which is not far from average in the US. My electricity costs 10.8¢ (8.7 Euro cents) per kWh, but this is considered low nationwide because my municipality owns its own power generation; on average electricity costs around 18¢ per kWh (15 Euro cents).
  • The US is less dense and therefore commute times are longer. Most people drive to work. A commute of around 20-30 km is considered average for most people. A commute of 40 km is not super uncommon, but 50 km and higher is rare.
[–] TheRagingGeek@lemmy.world 1 points 6 minutes ago

Software developers and other professionals in the US at least in my area are increasingly receiving “unlimited PTO” policies so you take whatever time you feel you need(but if it’s too much the company will punish you) and more so this has a two fold effect, unlimited PTO users tend to take less time off, and the company doesn’t pay out a PTO balance when you leave the company. So it’s really cheaper for the company to do this than to have a limited PTO policy.

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 15 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer

lol -- they have shitty healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and it's only "decent to excellent" compared to what most other Americans get, which varies between "absolutely terrible" and "just avoid going to the doctor at all".

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[–] W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 20 hours ago (3 children)

Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and typically the employer pays for the majority of the cost. This ends up costing a few hundred dollars a month to the worker out of pocket for their family, typically.

Compared to what? Because I still have to pay to see the doctor. And for supplies. And a whole bunch of other stuff that isn’t covered.

And a few hundred a month? Yeah, good luck with that d-tier insurance.

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[–] Darkmuch@lemmy.world 16 points 21 hours ago (4 children)

Definitely the most common. Though it is more for showing off how big of a number the salary is. Like the fabled “six figure salary” (100,000+) is a big goal post in many people’s mind. If it’s not salary, we tend to use hourly wage. Though that’s more often for lower amounts

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago) (1 children)

I mean, full employment for $48k is an absolute steal in this economy. This isn't even a bad deal for the employer.

[–] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 12 hours ago

Still necessary to quiet-quit at $48K and keep looking for openings in competing companies.

According to a How Money Works video (a while ago), tech companies stopped paying for training or promoting from within, so employees just started keeping their résumé current, and keeping an eye on openings. As a result, companies actually paid more to fill their middle-management positions than if they kept on promoting from within.

It is scary just how incompetent top-down companies are at maximizing their profits, especially considering how much data-driven research there is on human resources.

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[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 39 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

"emails per week: unlimited"

Just forward every employees email to him, he'll handle them all

[–] notabot@piefed.social 16 points 19 hours ago

He didn't say anything about dealing with them, that's an optional add-on.

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 31 points 1 day ago (14 children)

You shit more than three times a day?

[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 86 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

I don't, but my boss doesn't have to know that.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 31 points 23 hours ago (4 children)

Bingo! Poop breaks are code for “freedom time.”

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