Fuck AI

BooM Goes The Dynomite

I'll go a different direction here: what you suggest for a first date is an opportunity to show how cool you are.

I went on an amazing coffee date with a woman where she took me to a tiny coffee and chocolate shop that was amazing. Sure, most of why the date went great was that we clicked instantly and chatted for hours until we really had to go and that we both found each other very attractive, but the setting set the stage, I just don't think it would've gone as well in a Starbucks.

My first date with my wife she took me to the only lesbian bar in town then the next morning brunch at a popular cool taqueria. I remember thinking how she seemed so cool and in touch with the cool and fun parts of a city I'd been interested in since visiting occasionally in college.

I've had multiple great first dates to just local Mexican restaurants, followed by a walk in a park. They tended to be with women who had families and thus limited time and money, that too is personality. It involved the collaboration of "hey do you like mexican?" And when we enjoyed the meal, "there's a park nearby and I still have time, want to go for a walk"?

All of these served as ways to show some personality and to establish a baseline for what you think a fun night out with your partner could be. The first girl and I didn't enter a relationship because life got in the way shortly afterwards, so I can't say how it would have gone. But for the moms, yeah dates were typically a cheap meal, a cheap or free experience, often involving walking, and constrained by the fact that their kids and husbands (polyamory not cheating) were their top priorities. With my wife, just as that first date, our nights out together often involve a bit too much at a queer bar followed by hours upon hours of talking and maybe a meal at a cool but cheap restaurant before or after.

If you use chatgpt to decide on a first date plans I'm going to assume that 5 years ago you were the type to have a first date at fridays or applebees. And not because you really liked it, or thought it was a good value, but because it was a sit down restaurant nearby that you know is good enough and most people are fine with. It says a night out will be bland if anything, and probably the bare minimum. Fucking hell, asking "so what do you like to do for a first date?" is more interesting and charming than that, it at least implies that you're either very considerate or looking for a partner to take the lead or make decisions.

It's like Facebook chat asking if I want to summarize a conversation with my friends with AI. Mf'er, I spend time with these people because I enjoy it. Why in the hell would I want to run my conversation with them through a slop filter?

You also should show a bit of yourself. Your own interests, preferences, etc. An AI cannot help with that, unless you are the AI.

If someone wants an AI dinner date, they can make that up themselves.

At worst, just outright ask them if you're unsure, to see what they might be into. They'd likely appreciate the thought.

Just curious. I realize this community is probably the wrong place to ask, but how would you feel about someone using AI to brainstorm some date ideas but still doing the actual selection and planning themselves (and not bragging about using AI as something to admire)? To me, it doesn't feel too different from doing a web search of "date ideas" and working off whatever lists you get.