this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2026
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You can buy a full, real human skeleton for about $7,000. Since real skeletons don't stay intact once all the meat is gone, you could just drop a pile of bones in the bottom with a large pile of diatomaceous earth. That would give the local forensic team something to do.
Sorry but I've seen enough horror movies to know skeletons maintain their position perfectly as the body decomposes. Don't spread misinformation here.
They don't fall apart until some fool of a Took comes along and touches them. Then you're boned.
I bet the orc that first started banging his drum was just startled by the sudden sound and movement but tried to play it off as intentional by continuing and then it became a whole thing 🤷🏻
"Mom, what's that smell?"
"Probably just some meat that fell behind the counter, honey. It'll go away on its own in a few months."
"Can't daddy just get it?"
"... no."
Mmm they sorta do and sorta don't. Ligaments are last to go and aren't horrifically difficult to accidentally partially mummify.