this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2026
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That's quite the drastic conclusion to draw from people telling you when they are available (and that not being literally always) to help you for something you most like presented as not critical or dramatic when you asked them. Do you seriously expect people to preemptively cancel all their existing plans based on a hunch you might judge their whole character and the sincerity of your friendship on the sole trigger of a seemingly innocent "hey, when would you be available to help me move?"?
If you want to at least give people a chance to adjust, don't ask "when are you available?", instead try "[date] is when I want to move, can you fit helping me then into your schedule?" at least a few weeks ahead of that date.
There's a bit more to it than that and I mostly agree with what you're saying but I was in a bind and people who I've dropped everything to help in short notice, did not reciprocate. That's all.