this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2026
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Not like that at all. I want to hang out with men and women so I make friends with men and women. I invite them to stuff and they invite me to stuff. Sometimes I go to hang out and it winds up being mostly or all men. Sometimes mostly or all women. It really doesn't matter and the only thing that really makes the difference one way or the other is who is available at the time.
Avoid people who view their gender as an enclave cause they are for sure misogynist, misandrist, or both. Make yourself open to people who are more gender-agnostic if that term I just made up makes any sense.
It is a choice. You get to choose your friends. It's not RNG.
Most of that is not especially relevant. Being one of the girls or one of the guys has nothing to do with gender as an enclave or misandry or whatever. Clicking with any group of people isn't even guaranteed and you can absolutely hang out with a diverse mix of people and be considered one of either or one of both. But it's up to the group and the group dynamics, not you.
Being annoying and pedantic is a pretty good way of never getting picked as either, though.
Don't you see that what I'm getting at is that the entire concept of "one of the X" is weird and gross? Femaleness and maleness are not in-groups.