this post was submitted on 31 Aug 2025
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My first question about studies like this is always "how do they know this?". And I while I know I could find the study and dig into the setsils, I don't have to do that to know that this is the result of surveys taken over this time period. Unless technology develops to grant us a way to monitor and track the sex lives of people objectively and unobtrusively, that's just the best way can do. So any conclusions drawn really should be "the decline in people's surveyed frequency of sexual intercourse has gone down over time". Just to throw out some baseless speculation: could people in the past inflated their answers to appear "cool" or similar? Could there be cultural shifts pressuring respondents to deflate their numbers now? Personally, I'm inclined to believe the results of the study ARE true, but I'm not confident in that.
The decline of 3rd spaces, which is a big concept with multiple causes. Car-centric infrastructure, industrialization, women moving to the workforce, capitalism, technology, etc. It has become harder for people to have intimate personal interactions with others who live nearby. I believe the rise of things like social media, dating apps, and now AI companions is less about "hey we developed this new technology to replace and maybe be better than real human interaction" and more about "we need to develop something to replace what we have lost".
Consent. Reductions in arranged marriages and child marriages. Protections and rights for women and children.
Economics. Everyone is overworked and tired. I've seen this in a lot of the other comments here but I actually don't buy into this quite as much. There seems to be an inverse relationship between GDP per capita and birth rate, at least recently. Most of Europe, Japan, Australia, the US, Canada, Korea, and perhaps most notably... China. All have experienced declines in birthrates, and in a lot these cases there is good modern data showing the birth rates changing as these economies develop. The countries having the most children are poorer countries.
Now, it could be that these wealthier countries have access to birth control, so this does not necessarily dissolve economics as a factor. But, my own theory is that sex is one of the cheapest forms of entertainment available to humanity (if you don't factor in the costs of children). So the citizens of these wealthier countries are spending their time and money doing other things. Not just skii vacations or going yachting, but reading books and watching TV.
From my personal experience, the 3rd spaces is a huge thing. I've met my wife in such a space, and pre-Covid I've run a large Meetup group that focused on safe socialization (dinners, cinemas, hiking, art events). I've seen countless of hookups and dozens of marriages within that group. Covid pretty much killed Meetup groups on our area, so when we want to socialize all that's left are pubs and clubs, and there I only see single-gender groups with no overlap. I doubt anyone is getting laid, and even if they do, chances of a meaningful relationship before actually knowing each other's likes and dislikes, and common interests, are minimal.
My husband and I met on OKCupid, definitely not a traditional third space. But we met back in 2014, back when the site was still good. It's algorithm was actually really good back then if you put the effort into actually filling out the quizzes and surveys. But as time has gone on, it seems they have really enshittified. Instead of helping people finding meaningful relationships, they just try to keep people subscribed for as long as possible. And my husband and I met on OKCupid without ever subscribing for anything; we never gave them a dime.
Spoken like a man who's never tried to get laid. Sex is expensive. Dressing nicely, being fit, being financially well off enough to attract a girl in the first place, then entertaining them, taking them out, etc. It's not easy to pull off if you are poor. Especially when compared to free porn on tap and the stagnation of the middle and lower classes for decades.
Bro the people I see getting the most pussy are free spirits without an ounce of stability in their lives
Then you are young
It seems you believe the myths that media wants to tell you about modern courtship. Yes, such shallow people exist. And yes, there are thresholds of hygiene and stability someone should be expected to meet. But a lot of women want to get laid just as bad as men, not for the money or the status but for the sex.
Again is dependent a lot on your age.
Ever heard about STD rates in nursing homes? There may be a factor that's correlated with age, but age itself doesn't stop sex, or even slow it down that much.
I'm not saying people don't have sex as they get older (though there is ample evidence out there that they tend to have less). I'm saying that women are less likely to put up with a broke ass older man than a young stud. As you get older you become more prized as a breadwinner than you do as just a toy boy.
Ah, okay, I didn't see that from the comment tree. I don't think that's gender specific though; if anything, women seem even more likely to be rejected due to age than men. And there's also other confounding factors with age: as your cohort ages, they get paired off, and have less time to devote to dating, and do have a somewhat decreased sex drive pushing them out there. So the dating pool is quite a bit smaller - even if your looks didn't diminish, it likely won't carry you as far as your dating pool ages regardless of economic factors.