this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 41 comments
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[–] uranibaba@lemmy.world 129 points 4 days ago (3 children)

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/parrots-separated-england-zoo-cursing-swearing-at-guests/

They recently joined the Lincolnshire Wildlife Centre's colony of 200 African gray parrots in August, [...]

"I'm hoping they learn different words within colonies," Nichols added. "But if they teach the others bad language and I end up with 250 swearing birds, I don't know what we'll do."

πŸ˜‚

[–] GeriatricGambino@lemmy.world 72 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Narrator: Β«they did end up with 250 swearing birdsΒ»

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 54 points 4 days ago (2 children)

then you make it a feature! "visit the swearing parrot enclosure! be cussed at by various birds! we've tried stopping them, but they didn't care"

[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 19 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

I'd totally go see a swearing parrot enclosure.

COME SEE THE BIG HAIRY ASSED FECKING THE BAD F WORD WORSE THAN THE F WORD, YOU KNOW, PARROTS OF BASTARD BOLLOCKS LINCOLNSHIRE I STICK THIS FECKING PITCHFORK UP YOUR HOLE PARROTS

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

Our parrots are perfect for a pirate, but swear like a sailor!

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 3 days ago

... You don't know what to do with 250 swearing birds?

You start a comedy act, or show, is what you do.

Do a mockumentary.

... what do they mean 'don't know what to do'?

[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

There's a zoo near me that started out as a rescue park for abandoned parrots. One enclosure had all the potty-mouthed parrots in it and they hung up a sign saying

"If the parrots shout insults, they're (usually) not directed at you personally"

That always made me laugh.

Also don't buy parrots as pets. They're notoriously difficult to keep and most people get in way over their heads while the parrots live a miserable and depressed (and very long!) life.

[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I've heard that having a parrot for a pet is like having a perpetual 3 year old that can fly. Sounds like literal hell to me.

[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 1 points 2 days ago

Don't forget they also have bolt cutters for a face.

[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 35 points 4 days ago

If I go to a zoo and the parrots don't curse me out I'm asking for a refund.

[–] Zier@fedia.io 17 points 4 days ago (5 children)

African Grays are complete assholes. One of the worst birds to own.

[–] atomicorange@lemmy.world 22 points 4 days ago (4 children)

I have an African Grey. She’s quiet and gentle and obsessed with climbing under blankets and she’s dumb as a rock. Truly a model specimen.

Here she is climbing the stairs one by one instead of flying.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 13 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] atomicorange@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

More like β€œeventually… I will probably take a little rest halfway and make some sad sounds trying to manipulate you into carrying me”.

[–] Alcoholicorn@mander.xyz 6 points 3 days ago

Glass houses. I don't see you flying up the stairs.

BEAUTIFUL PLUMAGE

[–] Zier@fedia.io 2 points 4 days ago

Sadly they can be very good for a very long time, but once they become obsessed with something, the horrid noises they make are utterly exhausting. I have lived with 3 that have been utter nightmares. The Timneh's are worse than the larger Greys.

[–] marcos@lemmy.world 17 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

All parrots are great trolls.

All corvids are humorless vengeful beasts.

Both orders coexist around Australia. I'm really curious of how they do it. I imagine they have some kind of unstable feud.

[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 12 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Agreed on the parrots but a lot of corvids I've encountered were absolute trolls as well. Very intentional and calculating, they clearly had fun antagonizing other animals. Don't get me wrong, they're assholes. But they're funny assholes.

Maybe European corvids aren't like Australian ones. I've heard stories about your magpies.

[–] Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Unlike yours, our magpies aren't corvids. Our only native corvids are a couple of species of ravens and crows.

[–] faythofdragons@slrpnk.net 3 points 4 days ago

The british colonies all share the same trait of having animals that are named after superficially similar European animals. It's like how the American Robin and the European Robin are two completely different birds that just look sorta similar.

[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Oh, I didn't know that, what are they most closely related to then?

[–] Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] El_Scapacabra@lemmy.zip 2 points 4 days ago

Looks like you just handed me a new Rabbit Hole to dive into, lol.

[–] stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

squaakkkk!!! you're a dick!!! squaaaakkkk!!!

[–] foo@feddit.uk 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Norwegian Blues are quiet and chilled out, so I hear.

[–] FreeLikeGNU@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Lovely plumage!

[–] JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

How about a Norwegian Blue?

[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Too much pining for the fjords.

[–] JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca 2 points 4 days ago

He's perfectly fine

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 14 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] Worx@lemmynsfw.com 1 points 3 days ago

3 Menace 3 Society

[–] popekingjoe@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago

These are my kinda birbs.

[–] thefluffiest@feddit.nl 8 points 4 days ago

Just in: parrots invent the internet

[–] kaulquappus@feddit.org 9 points 4 days ago
[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

Reminds me of Eric the Legend

[–] zo0@programming.dev 6 points 4 days ago

Me and the boys at work

[–] lmmarsano@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 4 days ago

The lack of link in this post is a crime.

Post needs text alternative.Images of text break much that text alternatives do not. Losses due to image of text lacking alternative such as link:

  • usability
    • we can't quote the text without pointless bullshit like retyping it or OCR
    • text search is unavailable
    • the system can't
      • reflow text to varied screen sizes
      • vary presentation (size, contrast)
      • vary modality (audio, braille)
  • accessibility
    • lacks semantic structure (tags for titles, heading levels, sections, paragraphs, lists, emphasis, code, links, accessibility features, etc)
    • some users can't read the image due to lack of alt text (markdown image description)
    • users can't adapt the text for dyslexia or vision impairments
    • systems can't read the text to them or send it to braille devices
  • web connectivity
    • we have to do failure-prone bullshit to find the original source
    • we can't explore wider context of the original message
  • authenticity: we don't know the image hasn't been tampered
  • searchability: the "text" isn't indexable by search engine in a meaningful way
  • fault tolerance: no text fallback if
    • image breaks
    • image host is geoblocked due to insane regulations.

Contrary to age & humble appearance, text is an advanced technology that provides all these capabilities absent from images.

[–] Worx@lemmynsfw.com 2 points 4 days ago

You can't make me become ungovernable, btich! I always do what I'm told!

[–] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 4 days ago

Thats socialism