Rice is great if you’re really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
this post was submitted on 28 Jan 2026
689 points (98.7% liked)
Funny
14770 readers
925 users here now
General rules:
- Be kind.
- All posts must make an attempt to be funny.
- Obey the general sh.itjust.works instance rules.
- No politics or political figures. There are plenty of other politics communities to choose from.
- Don't post anything grotesque or potentially illegal. Examples include pornography, gore, animal cruelty, inappropriate jokes involving kids, etc.
Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
RIP Mitch hedberg
It’s one of the few foods I can fully indulge. I want to eat two thousand of everything.
Can't wait for my mashed rice
mochi is pretty popular
Not for dinner though.
Yes... I've certainly never had mochi for dinner, that would be silly of me 😰 .
I just realized I'm an adult too. Hmmmmm
That's called ttoekbokki.
Or bánh if you're in Vietnam.
Don't underestimate the Japanese
Rice pudding, rice porridge, rice gruel, rice cakes, rice noodles, rice rolls, mochi, tteokbokki
Okay you got me on all those. Mashed rice is great.
Bánh cuốn 🤤
okayu ?
Like Pad Thai?
You can mash potatoes with a ricer
But can you mash rice with a potatoer?
Welcome to the Hydraulic Press Channel
"Holy sheet!"
So get this
We have Long Grain Rice like the Australian Doongara variety and Indian Basmati variety, Medium Grain, and we also have Short Grain Rice some varieties of which are quite wide, such as Bomba Rice.
I think Bomba's probably what you'd be interested in.
Rice with the husk on seems larger and has more nutrients to carbs ratio but it's not very tasty. Probably the largest overall grain is called "Tilda Giant Wild Rice".
Subscribe
Baked rice?
Mashed rice?
Frenched fried rice?
Stuffed rice?
Rice Au Gratin.. ..the list is endless..
Yet the list ended. It's fine. Aight? /s
jacket rice
rice crisps (british "crisps")
That parable about the emperor asking for double the number of grains on each successive square of a chess board would be fucked of rice grains were that big.
Not like its easy with rice the size of rice
Yeah, that's like... 250 billion tons of rice. That's over 30 tons of rice per person in this world. Not sure this much rice even exists on this planet.
And then when trying to place the 33rd batch they ended up with a negative number of grains somehow
For medium sized rice, consider mochi or tteokbokki.
Isn't Mochi just small rice that's been physically abused until it becomes sticky and squishy?
Uwu
OwO even
It's a different kind of rice referred to as glutinous rice.
Exactly.
We would need a couple centuries to figure out how to cook it.
I mean what do you even do? Boil em? Mash em? Put them in stews?
How had Hobbits, with countless meals in one day, never stumbled upon the simple Roast?
Nah just skip the drying process after you harvest it and sell it fresh.
We humans never stop innovating
If rice becomes large enough to eat by ones and twos, will we start calling a single grain a rouse?
I’d like to see what rice would look like after a few hundred years of selecting for grain size
So that's why it's called a potato ricer.
Y'all need more glutinous rice based cakes in your life!
Tteobokki is easily accessible as it's Korean and trendy. But it's just the beginning of that delicious side of rice!
In China they had delicious variations. Salty and sweet alike. 粢饭糕 (zifangao) were a bit big. Fishstick sized. Deep fried. I usually had them as a dessert but the rice itself is neutral so it would work salty as well no doubt. Main thing is to eat it while it's hot, with a crunchy outside and the inside almost creamy.
But my favourite were the sliced nian gao. Imagine a roll of soft rice dough, ovalish in shape section. Cut in slices and those you can either fry or eat En sauce, like gnocchi really. Fantastic stuff!
Dammit I wish those were more accessible in Europe T_T
Tteobokki will have to do I guess.