this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2026
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[–] undeffeined@lemmy.ml 135 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 106 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 106 points 6 days ago (1 children)

send koozie picture imediately

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 113 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 102 points 6 days ago (2 children)

We did it Lemmy!

[–] kwarg@mander.xyz 24 points 6 days ago (2 children)

I got a dog named Koozie and my neighbor Darell is obsessed with him. He sends me texts when he is drunk...

[–] Qey@lemmy.zip 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)
[–] W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] piranhaconda@mander.xyz 3 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)
[–] Qey@lemmy.zip 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

send koozie picture imediately

[–] Winter_Oven@piefed.social 76 points 6 days ago

our king 👑

[–] redwattlebird@thelemmy.club 42 points 6 days ago (1 children)

That photo has a really nice composition

[–] imjustmsk@lemmy.world 13 points 5 days ago (1 children)

The photographer composed the image meticulosuly to artistically foreshadow the deep emotions by using physical barriers as a frame within a frame, A marvellous inception of frames sharpening the focus into the subject portraying loneliness. 

Thanks for reading the bullshit I just made up. 

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 4 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

I love Artspeak, it's the peak of bullshit. Remember those essay questions on tests? The people that were really good at them, grew up to write the description in art gallery brochures.

I remember stumbling into a Robert Ryman exhibit of his minimalist white paintings, with a friend who was an artist. We were amazed at the bullshit descriptions of his paintings, which were nothing but white squares (I will go to my grave convinced he was a fraud) The writer was particularly excited that they were painted on aluminum instead of canvas - MIND-BLOWING! They were still just white squares. That's not art, no matter how many syllables you throw at it.

As my friend said: An artist primes his canvas white, and says, "Okay, I'm ready to start painting." This guy primes his canvas, stands back to look at it, and says "Welp, I'm done!" and cracks a beer.

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Is it called ArtSpeak?

I just call it the bullshit box

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I kind of made that up, but it seems like that style of language should have a name. I declare it Public Domain, have at it.

[–] imjustmsk@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

Make it open-source will ya

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 42 points 6 days ago (2 children)

So you think he referred to the dog as king, or the neighbor for responding with the picture?

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 92 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I assume he meant the dog, the tone of his texts are not those of someone speaking to their king

[–] Septimaeus@infosec.pub 29 points 6 days ago

Well said, my liege.

[–] Lisk91@sh.itjust.works 32 points 6 days ago

Ofc the dog.

[–] MilitantAtheist@lemmy.world 18 points 5 days ago (2 children)
[–] Raiderkev@lemmy.world 7 points 5 days ago

HERESY! THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Poor dog looks extremely overweight. How anyone could see a picture like that and think it's cute and not alarming is beyond me.

[–] seatwiggy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 5 days ago

It's a pug. The genetic breathing problems are already alarming.

Babies have rolls like that, it sets off the same pleasure in my brain as seeing a cute pudgy baby.

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[–] Mac@mander.xyz 17 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Pugs are a perfect representation of how humanity views the Earth.

[–] blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world 7 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I vocally judge every english bulldog and pug owner and only recant if they were a rescue.

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

My wife tries to show me TikTok videos of pugs saying, "Isn't it cute?"

No, it's not cute. Its entire existence is suffering and the breeder needs to be in jail for animal abuse.

[–] musubibreakfast@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago (2 children)

What if there was an alien race with a lifespan that was eight times as long as ours, would they be able to breed the human equivalent of pugs?

[–] KingOfTheCouch@lemmy.ca 4 points 5 days ago

And if you objectively look at every other animal on the planet and then look at humans... how are we not pugs of our genetic family tree?

Fuckin' humans and our weird ass pointy noses and bulbous heads. We are weird.

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago

We fuck and we got genes. You can play with us.

[–] Fnaargh@lemmy.zip 1 points 5 days ago

I always thought they were a perfect representation of how the Earth viewed humanity.

[–] AffineConnection@lemmy.world 18 points 6 days ago

He just wants you to show him your koozie.

[–] BuboScandiacus@mander.xyz 13 points 6 days ago

The bestest boy

Glory to his house

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 13 points 6 days ago

I can see that.

[–] Foni@piefed.zip 6 points 6 days ago

Okay, let's start the conversation by clarifying the situation

There will be fighting in the afterlife about who gets to reincarnate as Koozie.

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