this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 day ago

One of these days Ill watch the walking dead.

[–] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 90 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 43 points 2 days ago (1 children)

FTG!
Chuck Norris Fact No. 39: "Chuck Norris stared evil in the eye and it went into hiding." America's favorite action star is doing just that this election -- calling on evangelical Christians across the nation to join him in crushing the creep of socialism under President Obama.

Norris and his wife, Gena, have filmed a public service announcement, unveiled exclusively at WND, wherein the two urge Christians to help save the country in November.

"We are here to talk about a growing concern we all share," Chuck Norris explains. "If we look to history, our great country and freedom are under attack. We're at a tipping point and, quite possibly, our country as we know it may be lost forever if we don't change the course in which our country is headed."

Gena warns that voter apathy among evangelicals in 2008 may have contributed to Obama's election in the first place.

"With our country at a crossroads, Chuck and I have asked ourselves what we can be doing to help support this great country we're blessed to live in and how we can encourage our like-minded American brothers and sisters to unite and let their voices be heard," she said. "It is estimated that in the 2008 election, 30 million evangelical Christians stayed home on voting day and Obama won the election by 10 million votes."

Chuck cautions Christians about the cost of doing nothing while the nation spirals into a state of socialism from which there will be no return.

"We know you love your family and your freedom as much as Gena and I do," he says in his appeal to Americans. "And it is because of that we can no longer sit quietly or stand on the sidelines and watch our country go the way of socialism or something much worse."

Gena urged Christians to register and cast their votes on Election Day to ensure "our voices will be heard."

Chuck recalled the cautionary words of great patriots on the subject of preserving liberty:

"As Edmund Burke said, 'All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men and women do nothing.'

"Our great president, Ronald Reagan said, 'Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected and handed on for them to do the same.'"

Likewise, Gena noted, "President Reagan went on to say that 'You and I have a rendezvous with destiny. We will preserve for our children this last best hope of man on earth, or we will sentence them to take the first step into a thousand years of darkness. If we fail, at least let our children and our children's children say of us we justified our brief moment here. We did all that could be done.'"

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 18 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So TLDR: Chuck Norris took on democracy, and won? 😳🤪

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

so sad, what a political weirdo. Let's assure Democracy wins, ultimately, now that Chuckles has been defeated by the forces of Life itself.

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 2 points 2 days ago

That... seems unlikely at this point, but I strongly hope that I am wrong.

Like he said that he was going to take Venezuela, then he did it. And he said that he would bomb Iran, and then he did.

He also said that voting in places that did not vote correctly should have something done about that, so...

[–] darthsundhaft@piefed.social 23 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Nah, he's not funny. He was a Trump supporter. Now he's dead,

[–] cdf12345@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 days ago

I’ve found it hilarious

[–] GiantChickDicks@lemmy.ml 56 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 22 points 2 days ago (1 children)

What has the kid done to you

[–] TerHu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

lots. for one example just refer to the other lengthy comment here

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That's talking about Chuck Norris, not the kid.

[–] TerHu@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 days ago

you’re right and i can’t read

[–] Dogiedog64@lemmy.world 32 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Chuck Norris is dead. Good.

[–] PrettyFlyForAFatGuy@feddit.uk 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] Dogiedog64@lemmy.world 19 points 2 days ago

He was... and now he's dead :).

[–] Hegar@fedia.io 27 points 2 days ago (3 children)

He was a shitbag and he ruined barrens chat.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 days ago

Where is Mankrik's wife???

[–] ZC3rr0r@piefed.ca 5 points 2 days ago

Now that brings back memories, old barrens chat was such an early 2000s meme-fest.

[–] Arcadeep@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

I miss the days when something like barrens chat could exist

[–] Translucide@piefed.social 23 points 2 days ago
[–] moakley@lemmy.world 18 points 2 days ago

This is an old Steven Wright joke. It's fine to steal it and use it on your young relatives, but stealing it and giving it to a bigot is kind of shitty.

Also it flows better without the "already". It's supposed to be punchy and absurd. Omit needless words.

God damnit we have to hate chuck Norris now too??

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)

"I was sober for 11 years straight."

"What happened?"

"I turned 12."

[–] Amir@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 days ago

That implies he drank for a year as a baby, which explains why he became a Trump supporter.

[–] Morose@lemmy.world 19 points 2 days ago (5 children)

This is how I found out Chuck Norris died... RIP

[–] SuspiciousCatThing@pawb.social 45 points 2 days ago

No it's okay, he sucked.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 days ago

GR (Good Riddance)

Chuck Norris never dies. He just waits.

He only lost the first of his 99 lives.

[–] Grabthar@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

He didn't die. He's been training the last few weeks. The fight with Death waa scheduled for today, where he can try for a best two out of three challenge. Odds favour him getting four wins.

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

Poor kid had AIDS too

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

But why does Haley Joel Osment have AIDS?

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Raped by one of the Trump-Epstein group, poor kid.

[–] kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Must be Korean!

[–] Translucide@piefed.social 1 points 2 days ago