Still deciding.
this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2026
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Gotta love they ask for your income level before asking your name.
I could go for a big pile of towels to hide in.
you can put that in the lover's style section
It must stink
I'm not sure what you wrote. Do you think it will stink? Or do you demand that it has to?
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Yet another marriage ruined by Big Towel. Smh my head
I really hope this isn't satire.
I mean, it's pretty good satire but it would be good if it's true
It's a @truewagner bit.
I'm going to need to see a rear picture of both Darlene and Tom before I can really decide. So I suppose I'm still deciding.
Quick question, is the pile of towels still around?
It doesn't say "check one only".
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Father Donovan was always pretty chill.
Everybody knows Father Donovan's a got thing for Darlene. Word is she's wild in the sack.
Tom looking forlornly out of the towels is gutting me.
I've never seen an analog digital media post before.
it was delivered by a snail flown by a pigeon
Very considerate of them.
What an absolute frood.
some may even call him a hoopy frood
Well he certainly knows where his towel is
Absolute gigafrood energy.
Tom gets it
He understands.
GODDAMIT! Here I was thinking that this was a wonderful way to maturely alert the world to their new status, and in the end it just turns out to be nothing but another AD! SPAM!
I'm profoundly disappointed.
growing up in a small town, this is accurate.
the Jr high science teacher was the town whore. you could find her at the bar most Fridays. you knew she was there by the smokers cackle.
how would a student know who's in the bar you might be asking yourself. because it was the town watering hole and everybody went there.
how did a student know she was the town whore? because several high school students couldn't keep their mouths shut after losing their virginity.
she did throw the best parties in highschool though, if you were into the swingers lifestyle.
fun fact, her husband was a cuck.
Unfortunate that she was a pedophile but at least she has event planning skills
I mean..these were 17-18 year old students. well within the age of consent in the state this happened in.
still gross though.
Fair yeah, I think the teacher power dynamics make it worse too 😔 hopefully these guys she used are doing ok
I'm sure they're just as fucked up as everything else that happened in that shithole 😆
Jr High teacher, so they'd be a few years past being her students. Age gap is problematic, but I don't see any school-related abuse of power there.
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I wonder how the big pile of towels is resilient to the elements, such as wind, rain, or earthquakes
Yeah, I need a LOT more clarity on this "pile-o-towels" situation. 48 hours? Is there a chamber under there? Or does the pile just press down on him? Isn't it soggy from the rain? What if you have to pee? Or eat? Or watch TV? How is the wifi reception in there? Does he only do it when she's getting frisky with random dudes in the house?
It's the old tarp and towel. 3 layers of towels, then tarp, then 15 more layers of towels. You climb in between the 15 to get the comfort/weight right. The top 3 layers absorb the loud rain drop noise and the tarp keeps out the leaks.
Thanks, Tom.
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Love Alan Wagner. Such a recognizable style. It feels like handmade, bespoke humor. A rarity nowadays
Lover's Style? I'm surprised this hasn't been jumped on yet. "All Conquering?" "(Power) Bottom?" "70s Porn?"
I would prefer a few standard options to choose from. Leaving it as a fill in the blank is a lot of pressure.
Very whimsical stuff going on.
"All our fucking neighbors" this is the internet you dont have to self censor
Edit: /s goddamn it lol this was supposed to parody these types of annoying comments
Doesn't really match the tone, it's probably the name of the apartment complex
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And just where can one procure such a pile of towels?
Oh don't worry, the post office delivers them all the time.
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