Install a bidet. They're 20 bucks, it's a spray nozzle on a hose, they're awesome. Saw them on holiday in Cambodia everywhere, installed one when I got home, have zero regrets.
this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2026
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Sure, BUT, don't just connect it to the cold water supply - they need proper isolation - I've heard of cases where households have gotten really sick and they found that bacteria from the bum gun had made it back to the drinking water.
What? How would that even work? The nozzle gets dirty and the bacteria propagate three feet up the tube against occasional water flow and into the main pipe?
Backflow preventers are a thing. I’d never considered it for a bidet but it makes sense.
It's tough kid, but it's life? Don't forget to pack a wife?
Downvoters don't get the reference
Stop wiping and use a portable bidet. You'll never go back to wiping.
Portable bidet
Okay we have a bidet at home but even when I use it I still need to wipe after. Is it supposed to pressure wash your ass or what exactly am I supposeed to do when using it.
Is it supposed to pressure wash your ass
Yes. I only use toilet paper afterwards to dry everything.
I tried that but it just does not clean that well it seems. The toilet paper gets dirty
Use your hands and wash with soap. Then use toilet paper to pat dry afterwards. That’s what I do and you can’t get any cleaner than that.
You maybe have a shitty bidet, or its settings need to be adjusted .
Also there's a bit of technique - you gotta move around a bit; work the spray around to get everything.
You're just not supposed to doomscroll on the toilet until everything is dried and has to be scraped off.
I don't usually spend more than 5 minjtes shitting so.....
pressure wash your ass
Yes. It shouldn't take that much pressure.
But it does not clean that well.
laughs in bidet
Eat more fibre
And thinking about the amount of paper used, praying that is not going to be clogged
Flush every few wipes to reduce the chance.
Get yourself a proper heated bidet and you’ll never go back. I bought a Toto it warms the seat, automatically shoots soothing warm water at your angry brown eye and then blow dry’s your bum.
Best purchase ever!
constipation perhaps.
Wiping more just turns the paper red instead of brown