this post was submitted on 18 May 2026
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me_irl

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[–] saltnotsugar@lemmy.world 39 points 4 days ago (3 children)

My dream job is to make potions in a cottage and invite my regulars to tea.

[–] X@piefed.world 29 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Hello, Potion Seller. I’m going into battle, and I want your strongest potions.

[–] saltnotsugar@lemmy.world 12 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I’ve got just the thing. Cola with some THC. I believe it stands for tactical hitting charge!

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 8 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

There used to be a drink called Marley's Mellow Mood that had hemp seed oil in it and it was like the opposite of an energy drink. I loved it.

[–] NostraDavid@programming.dev 9 points 4 days ago (2 children)
[–] pulsewidth@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

Always a great trip down the classic YouTube memory lane

[–] raman_klogius@ani.social 1 points 4 days ago

Also Potion Man, which surprisingly only came out this month

[–] plyth@feddit.org 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Add a camera and start streaming and it can become a thing.

Which made me realize that influencers are commodified regular lives. Life has become so expensive that it takes hundreds of viewers to finance one person to live as they please.

[–] daw@feddit.org 3 points 4 days ago

Both the original description and yours ist just euphemism for being a drug dealer🙃

[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 27 points 4 days ago (2 children)

DO YOU WANT TO BE A LANDLORD

[–] ji59@hilariouschaos.com 13 points 4 days ago

No, don't worry, being a landlord is too evil for me. I would prefer to be drug cartel kingpin.

[–] caseyweederman@lemmy.ca 3 points 4 days ago

C'mon! Let's go and evict

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 18 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I just want someone in my life I can refer to as "my mysterious benefactor." Is that so much?

[–] OrganicMustard@lemmy.world 11 points 4 days ago

I think it's called sugar daddy now

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 7 points 3 days ago

I'm disabled so my income source is neither mysterious nor adequate for basic survival.

[–] MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz 13 points 4 days ago

The secret ingredient is ~~crime~~ no sense of morality.

[–] binarytobis@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Second best to OP, I’ve always thought, would be night security guard at a place that never checks up on you.

The kind of guy who is deep asleep and doesn’t see the protagonist on the security cameras. I’d be full on playing video games, and even if I noticed someone stealing shit I’d just let them, assuming I didn’t work for an orphanage or something.

I doubt that job really exists anymore, though. They probably have 3rd parties check up in you remotely, and track your active status in Teams or whatever. I guess what I really want is to (not really) work in the 80’s or 90’s.

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 4 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Yeah that's a good one, also hotel night receptionist is very chill afaihbt.

Also about the security job, you normally have to go and do rounds every hour or so, and blip your tag. I mean it's a security job, they will know what you are doing, unless you're a bulldog with a spiked collar guarding a junkyard or something.

[–] techt@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Drug dealer is a lot of work and super high stress.

[–] techt@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Sure, but those things weren't listed as disqualifying criteria

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

That's just a dream of power.

I dream of living the nice life without any source of income/power, amongst a society where others do the same.

[–] bigbangdangler@reddthat.com 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I'd say less a "dream of power" and more "enough money to live my life, but not too much". In that sense it's different from just wanting endless money.

I just want to be comfortable and to be able to experience my life. In our society, that takes (some) money, unfortunately.

Totally agree with you though, in that it would be much better if we had a smarter society where money didn't have to be involved to get that life. That utopic planet where they've moved beyond the antiquated ideas of wealth and power and everyone just chills and travels. I'd live there.

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 2 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Yes, not much or endless power, but still enough to pay someone to make stuff (eg bread) for you - I just still called that a dream of 'some' power, an ez life (that imo is technically possible now for all the billions of us).

I'm just saying that I want bread without making it or make (pay) someone else to make it (I don't like it). Idk, just a dream. Ppl need & want to work, but what they want. Perhaps a species somewhere can achieve something similar.

[–] conartistpanda@lemmy.world 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Does furry porn artist count? It's totally a job, but it's technically not a job.

[–] Obituarykidney@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

Freelance contracting is totally a real job. It's technically what my fiance does, except it's software engineering contracts. Same diff.

[–] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

Generational wealth.

[–] Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

It is a dream, yes. As long you're also doing something good with it. Or else you'd just be like the next rich fuck that is basically cancer to society.

Wifey and I work for free in shelters for people that got fucked hard by life. The line between prosperity and i-wanna-die is often crossed faster than one might think. In ways one might not have foreseen. And at a point one might not have expected it.

[–] waldfee@feddit.org 4 points 4 days ago
[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

those kinds of situations usually attract badges

[–] _cnt0@sh.itjust.works 3 points 4 days ago

I need to know where to get that plushie.

[–] Kurtagag@lemmy.ca 1 points 4 days ago

I dont really hav a job but I get paid. Twice a month actually

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 1 points 4 days ago

I want to be an immortal trickster monkey.