this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2026
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Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

RULES:

  1. Your post must be a screen capture of a microblog-type post that includes the UI of the site it came from, preferably also including the avatar and username of the original poster. Including relevant comments made to the original post is encouraged.
  2. Your post, included comments, or your title/comment should include some kind of commentary or remark on the subject of the screen capture. Your title must include at least one word relevant to your post.
  3. You are encouraged to provide a link back to the source of your screen capture in the body of your post.
  4. Current politics and news are allowed, but discouraged. There MUST be some kind of human commentary/reaction included (either by the original poster or you). Just news articles or headlines will be deleted.
  5. Doctored posts/images and AI are allowed, but discouraged. You MUST indicate this in your post (even if you didn't originally know). If an image is found to be fabricated or edited in any way and it is not properly labeled, it will be deleted.
  6. Absolutely no NSFL content.
  7. Be nice. Don't take anything personally. Take political debates to the appropriate communities. Take personal disagreements & arguments to private messages.
  8. No advertising, brand promotion, or guerrilla marketing.

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[–] skooma_king@piefed.social 2 points 32 minutes ago

Could simplify the math and just carry around some durian fruit

[–] krisevol@lemmus.org 1 points 56 minutes ago

About 200. You will key everyone away for 100's of yards after the funeral.

[–] WolfmanEightySix@piefed.social 1 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

That’s why an apple keeps the doctor away. But I thought it was one apple.

[–] Asafum@lemmy.world 4 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

The secret to keep everyone away is not how many apples you eat, but how many entire bulbs of garlic you eat!

The downside is that it keeps vampires away too. :(

[–] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 9 points 3 hours ago

I have IBS that is triggered by sugar alcohols. Eating one whole apple gives me awful gas about an hour later followed by 8-12 hours of violent diarrhea the next day.

So... One apple is enough to everyone away from me.

[–] almost1337@lemmy.zip 4 points 3 hours ago

Eat enough apple seeds and you won't have to worry about people or their proximity to you ever again.

[–] macaw_dean_settle@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

Why does it have to be Before Christ?

[–] A_Union_of_Kobolds@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago (1 children)
[–] beyoublahaj@lemmy.world 4 points 4 hours ago

John Oliver jumspscare