Utilitarianism is a tricky philosophy, it's got a lot of sharp edges like this.
this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2026
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I mean... It's only 6 fucking lanes. This guy looked old enough to know what Frogger is, ffs. Frogger pedestrian rules should replace tax funded schooling of children. Only those who can cross streets without annoying drivers should survive.
This guy is going to shoot a pedestrian for pushing crosswalk signal buttons and claim he's stopping a serial killer.
It's not wrong in the sense that an idling combustion engine is more polluting that one maintaining a speed. An ideal intersection is where all cars can smoothly interact without stopping, something only possible in the theoretical computer guided traffic crossings. Such places would have to have a pedestrian bridge nearby, as they aren't compatible with the slow human form.
Ped bridges take up a large area and are expensive. Also what if youre in a wheel chair?
They typically take the form of a ramp.
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(24 replies)
I would make every car on earth wait indefinitely if you gave me the power. People would die, sure, but so many more would be saved.
simply frame perfect parry the vehicles when they collide with you like a real man
LT + X Tiger Drop
No, this guy has actual shitbag vibes: I think it's real.
This HAS to be satire
I'd say it's about 50/50. Which would make it very good satire if it was. But I don't want to influence Schroedinger's satire by peeking.
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(2 replies)
Trying to quantify road rage?
Troll's gonna troll.
I think this guy is maybe just a for real asshole.
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What makes me mad is when people press the button and then jaywalk immediately anyway. If you press it, you should have to wait just like the drivers will.
What makes me mad is pressing the button and then having to wait an additional 5+ minutes for the ped signal to change because it needs to finish the current green phase for cross traffic and an advance left turn phase before letting peds go.
I’m not a civil engineer, but based on my experience with traffic lights pushing the button doesn’t actually alter the order of operations for the lights, it just makes it so the next time there is a natural gap in traffic that would allow for safe crossing, the crosswalk light turns on. So it doesn’t affect drivers at all. I’m still not a fan of jaywalking unless the road is REALLY clear.
That said, I’m always Jay walking when I go somewhere :P
It depends on the area. Some places work like this but there are plenty of intersections near me which have a dedicated pedestrian crossing sequences
This is how they seem to work in the US. Coming from other countries - where you know all vehicles have a red light when pedestrians have green - it’s fucked up. Same with green turn signals for vehicles, actually. I don’t know whom thought that made sense…
Not for smaller roads that intersect with arterials.
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No, nothing is worse than reclining your airplane seat.
What’s wrong with reclining?!
There's already almost no leg room - and sometimes negative leg room, like for yours truly, who's 6'5".
So.. recline your seat?
Doesn't make room for my knees. Also, passing the buck to someone else is just making me the last asshole in the chain.
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A bored child on an airplane reclining their airplane seat, repeatedly, while throwing a tantrum.
No, I can scare kids. I look big, mean, and scary.