this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2026
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Programmer Humor

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I love fun quizzes like this. Let’s all share! (lemmy.world)
submitted 5 hours ago by cannedtuna@lemmy.world to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev
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[–] glibg10b@lemmy.zip 10 points 1 hour ago (1 children) 
-----BEGIN OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----
b3BlbnNzaC1rZXktdjEAAAAABG5vbmUAAAAEbm9uZQAAAAAAAAABAAAAMwAAAAtzc2gtZW
QyNTUxOQAAACC6BPuFW94rFl033+m7MHTouxkIdEXsilx+sI6Z6Iul7AAAAJAHHAUZBxwF
GQAAAAtzc2gtZWQyNTUxOQAAACC6BPuFW94rFl033+m7MHTouxkIdEXsilx+sI6Z6Iul7A
AAAEAHVmMS+9A6uhD6r6iUAxubrNuS2lx4CPayJ2B4hL8HNroE+4Vb3isWXTff6bswdOi7
GQh0ReyKXH6wjpnoi6XsAAAACHdhbGRvQGhlAQIDBAU=
-----END OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----

***
PUBLIC KEY BELOW
***
ssh-ed25519 AAAAC3NzaC1lZDI1NTE5AAAAILoE+4Vb3isWXTff6bswdOi7GQh0ReyKXH6wjpnoi6Xs
[–] floofloof@lemmy.ca 4 points 29 minutes ago

What a coincidence! That's my cat's name.

[–] shiftymccool@piefed.ca 3 points 19 minutes ago

Should be private ssh key and public ip address. public key can be derived if necessary and it does you no good to have a key to an unknown door

[–] blurry@feddit.org 11 points 1 hour ago

Please mark your territory by posting the hosts you have visited with your favorite cat name.

[–] Shindo66@lemmy.world 1 points 44 minutes ago

Jokes on you, I have no idea what youre talking about

[–] queerlilhayseed@piefed.blahaj.zone 119 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago) (2 children) 
-----BEGIN OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----  
WhattheAAAAdidyoujustAAAAAAAsayaboutmeyoulittlebitch+IllhaveyouknowIg  
raduatedtopofmyclassintheNavySealsandIvebeeninvolvedinnumeroussecretr  
aidsonAl+QuaedaandIhaveover300confirmedkillsIamtrainedingorillawarfar  
eandImthetopsniperintheentireUSarmedforcesYouarenothingtomebutjustano  
thertargetIwillwipeyoutheAAAAoutwithprecisionthelikesofwhichhasneverb  
eenseenbeforeonthisEarthmarkmyAAAAAAAwordsYouthinkyoucangetawaywithsa  
yingthatshittomeovertheInternet+ThinkagainAAAAAAAswespeakIamcontactin  
gmysecretnetworkofspiesacrosstheUSAandyourIPisbeingtracedrightnowsoyo  
ubetterprepareforthestormmaggotThestormthatwipesoutthepatheticlittlet  
hingyoucallyourlifeYoureAAAAAAAdeadkidIcanbeanywhereanytimeandIcankil  
lyouinoversevenhundredwaysandthatsjustwithmybarehandsNotonlyamIextens  
ivelytrainedinunarmedcombatbutIhaveaccesstotheentirearsenaloftheUnite  
dStatesAAAAAACorpsandIwilluseittoitsfullextenttowipeyourmiserableasso  
ffthefaceofthecontinentyoulittleshitIfonlyyoucouldhaveknownwhatunholy  
retributionyourlittle/clever/commentwasabouttobringdownuponyoumaybeyo  
uwouldhaveheldyourAAAAAAAtongueButyoucouldntyoudidntandnowyourepaying  
thepriceyougoddamnidiotIwillshitfuryalloveryouandyouwilldrowninitYour  
eAAAAAAAdeadkiddo==  
-----END OPENSSH PRIVATE KEY-----

EDIT: almost forgot to sign it!

Love,
/u/queerlilhayseed

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 40 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

hehe you have the word ass in your private key, what are the odds

[–] queerlilhayseed@piefed.blahaj.zone 52 points 4 hours ago

I insert swears into all my ssh keys so they get censored out by profanity filters. Good luck hacking me now, squares 😎🏍️🛹

[–] terranoid@lemmy.cafe 5 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago) (1 children)

The == had me wondering for too long

[–] queerlilhayseed@piefed.blahaj.zone 10 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago) (1 children)

Haha I started trying to format the text so that it was technically a valid ed25519 key, then it became too much work for a silly joke so I settled for filtering/replacing all the invalid chars and slapping the == padding at the end. Needs more AAAAAA strings to really sell it, I think, but I'm glad it turned out well enough to merit a second glance lol.

Edit: I swapped all instances of fuck|fucker|fucking with As, I think it's an improvement.

[–] Magnum@infosec.pub 2 points 1 hour ago (2 children)

It is very good - I will steal it.

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 hour ago

Now reverse engineer a matching public key.

[–] Trampampoline@sh.itjust.works 2 points 50 minutes ago

NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW

[–] KickMeElmo@sopuli.xyz 63 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Is it bad that this bothers me purely because the public key can be derived from the private key, so providing both is unnecessary?

[–] one_old_coder@piefed.social 7 points 3 hours ago

Not bad, I had the same thought.

[–] reader@lemmy.zip 22 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago) (1 children)

public: fake

private: gay

[–] undefinedTruth@lemmy.zip 8 points 3 hours ago

That's a private / pubic key pair.

[–] saltnotsugar@lemmy.world 18 points 4 hours ago

Public: Ssssssshhhh!
Private: Sssssshhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

[–] TheFunkyMonk@lemmy.world 21 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

hunter2

[–] BagOfHeavyStones@piefed.social 5 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

Obligatory *******

[–] Alexica@lemmy.world 15 points 4 hours ago (2 children)

id_rsa id_rsa.pub

[–] friend_of_satan@lemmy.world 1 points 7 minutes ago

lol, rsa in 2026.

[–] Scoopta@programming.dev 11 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

🤔 I do believe this is backwards, or you're Japanese

[–] Alexica@lemmy.world 5 points 1 hour ago

I’m dislexic. My friends call me Dislexica

[–] gressen@lemmy.zip 11 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Public key can be derived from private key.

[–] NaibofTabr@infosec.pub 20 points 4 hours ago

right but why would I bother doing the extra work if I can just get it from you

[–] wopalopa@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago

192.168.0.1 1.1.1.1

damn im cute

[–] akunohana@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 points 3 hours ago

Public: myPrivateKey_is
Private: PasswordProtected_so

[–] ruuster13@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 hours ago

Pussy Oliver

how do I save as ssh keys is that part of apple key ring?