Technology

Mine doesn't have anything of a particularly personal nature, just obvious stuff from purchase history like:

• Likely favors Merrell brand for outdoor footwear (I have purchased the same model of Merrell shoe several times)
• Hikes frequently (a reasonable guess about someone who repeatedly buys hiking boots)
• Likely has a ThinkPad laptop (I bought trackpoint caps)
• Likely owns an Olympus camera (I bought a battery for an Olympus camera)

Mine is pretty straightforward, "builds electronics" "has precision tools" "likely has a french press" (I do, I bought it on Amazon), "prioritizes high-speed data transfer", "Probably has a computer system with internal expansion" (I bought an NVMe SSD from Amazon once), "Likely lives in (the town in my saved shipping address)"

So surveillance. Much sleuthing.

About you We haven't saved anything yet.

Phew.

• Likely favors ZigBee smart home protocol
• Plays video games across multiple platforms
• Consistently repurchasing specialty food staples
• Likely has outdoor space

Though it definitely gets a lot of other things wrong, like the number of kids I have.

Hilariously I apparently am big into adheasivly mounting things and also buying batteries. Nothing about my buttocks, sadly.

Oh. And I prefer Anker chargers.

Not only did they have my age range completely inaccurate they've also listed camping as a hobby. I don't even own a tent, I have no idea why they think I like camping. I've never bought any camping equipment from them, I've never accessed the website from communal wi-fi in a campsite. I don't know where they're getting this assumption from.

Damn, nothing about how extensively I told them to get fucked when they put ads in Prime Video

Mine says "Builds Xbox controller collection gradually." I buy my husband a new controller about every 8 months because the sticks start to drift. Maybe it should say Xbox makes shit products.

They probably should have made customer-facing descriptions more-flattering.

I never deleted my account so I checked and the most it knew about me was like, playes pc games extensively and thats probably bc i purchased some pc components a long time back. Also said i make bread at home regularly. Jokes on you amazon that bread machine i bought that i always think about using more has sat unused for 2 months

"Maintains consistent snacking preferences" the most specific one "Owns rasps" If it really got me, it would call me out on what I usually use Amazon for...   Last minute project stuff.

I feel attacked by this headline.