I would never stoop as low as that.
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PS4 and Xbox One are weak, last-gen consoles. I'd use the same PC that I have all the porn tabs open on.
this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2025
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Taking a break from your game for a quick wank, like a man of class.
Who said anything about taking a break? I've got 2 monitors and 2 hands.
I said 'quick wank' not 'goon sesh'
I have no wife and no job, so that's pretty much every day for me.
Lotion. Ick. Stop cutting your dick skin off you crazy puritanical people.
This dude thinks it's better dry
Why would you not use lotion and risk chafing your cock?
Because actual lube works better?
Sounds like you don't have foreskin
Just replace everything with a bed.
Me, except no porn so I'm ravenous for that pussy when she gets back.
Yeah but what's you maximum of days to let that load build up before you really need to drain it off
That’s enough internet for me today
Where's the goon cave?
Same here, except I also use the opportunity to cook stuff for myself that my wife doesn't like. Fuck pizza.
Not a romantic partner (obviously) but currently my sister and I are roommates, and when she's out of town or staying at her boyfriend's place I make the meals she isn't really interested in, like Moqueca.
I never heard of Moqueca and googled it, and it does look very delicious!
Yeah, like anything containing onions, garlic, bell peppers or other ingredients with too much flavour.
I decided she can be not home permanently. I hope your situation is better lol
If I couldn't use onions or garlic, that would be a dealbreaker
Having to eat bland foods for the rest of my life was an insignificant factor in the decision to free myself from servitude, but it was still a factor.
I like a good steak. However, my wife does not prefer it medium rare - she belongs to those heretics who would shamelessly order it well done (that's why I never go to steakhouses with her). She also hates spicy food. Or some kinds of traditional German food which I grew up with.
So yeah. Whenever she's away, it's usually steak, some spicy Asian dish or Berlin style grilled liver.
Ah, doesn't sound TOO bad. I was legitimately prohibited from using any vegetables in my sauces. Sauce had to be just the meat, cream, melted cheese to thicken it up and it had to be a store-bought mix for flavor. Like those Maggi ones, 4 cheese mix, carbonara mix, etc. No experimenting. Even tomatoes were a no-go.
Needless to say, I let her do the cooking because I found it depressing. When she was away, I'd make a nice curry or chilli... Or, like you, a steak, which I prefer medium rare (though sometimes rare is nice too).
Wow, okay. At least I got my wife to appreciate a decent sauce, and I got her off the store-bought sauce mixes.
It's been many years but I still remember which recipe did the trick: Salisbury steak.
Make steak patties using ground beef, Worcestershire sauce, mustard, pepper, breadcrumbs. Fry until brown. Set aside. In the same pan, sauté 250g mushrooms and a chopped onion until brown, add tomato paste, add some flour, add 500ml beef stock and a pinch of sugar (ketchup works well too). Salt, pepper, Worcestershire sauce to taste. Add steaks to sauce. Cook until steaks done.
She loves this and it kinda cured her from buying Maggi crap, lol.
Oh yeah, Salisbury steak is a killer recipe. Love it.
I actually went straight to the ingredients list without reading the rest of your comment and went "hey that sounds like Salisbury steak" lol
Well done steak can be amazing when marinated and slowly baked with fat being addrd in the process.
I'd also fuck pizza
I don't have white or black nintendos.
Only 26? Amateur.
?! And you're a pro?! A professional gooner?!
More than this yokel that's for sure.
You are not allowed to wear shorts or eat pizza while she is home?
the shorts are for the pornhub.
The pizza is for the hotel hallway. 😉
This feels like a prime 2018 meme
Ewww...
Xbox?
as funny as this comment is, do console wars really need to exist? does brand loyalty and basing your identity on the products you consume need to exist?
No, they don't.
Microsoft wars on the other hand...
That is also a joke. Don't base your identity on brands, technologies or corporations; not even on hating them. Base it on values and moral convictions, then judge the rest by them.
PC or GTFO!
Pretty much lol