Perhaps you misunderstand, so let's go back to the basics.
Lemmy.World TOS prohibits the use of, among other things, ableist slurs.
If you use such slurs, expect to face consequences.
I am a Lemmy admin, and part of what I do is enforce the TOS when I see violations.
We may choose to simply remove rule-breaking comments, or hand out temp-bans or perma-bans to those that can't seem to follow the rules.
If you cannot follow the rules, I suppose you will eventually find out the consequences for yourself.
So ultimately, I don't care if you agree with the TOS or not. Only whether you follow them.
I suggest using the power of your free speech to walk up in person too anyone of color and using any of those words to their face and see how your "free speech" goes.
Furthermore, a little reasearch on what "free speech" means and doesn't mean might be in order.
What I find interesting is that so many people seem to want to stand up on the side of bigotry and demand their "right" to be a bigot and use bigoted language. I'm not sure that's really a great look.