ooof then yeah, she's being pressured into being eye candy for the managers, disgusting
And yep, the only people that care about such things are the wrong people. I had a lawyer show up to an online meeting with me with like a white t-shirt or something super casual like that, he apologized, I couldn't have cared less because either way he's super polite and I'm there to get his knowledge and not have him look good for me.
I didn't intend to come across dismissive or hostile, and I agree with you on the rest of what you're saying. If it was my language that's just how I express myself, truly, as I have strong feelings about this, it is something that has been beaten into me since the moment I started to have opinions about how I dress myself because me choosing the options that men have is too much to ask of society. Also, regardless of what your intentions were that comparison felt a bit out of touch. I think a much better example on how patriarchy affects men negatively is the social isolation and the "men don't cry". But saying that being forced into pants because it's hot when I'm talking about being forced into being eye candy since we're little girls and literally screwing up our bone structures is not a fair comparison and totally missing the point. As if I said that a slap on the face hurts as much as being kicked in the balls.
Yeah, you still cannot compare "I'm a bit hot in these pants" to "you need to be eye candy and pretend you aren't bothered by men oogling at you while you're forced to treat them nicely" or "fuck your spine and feet bone structure so you look nice for men" though. (Those high heels not only mess up your feet, they also mess up your spine) I took the "I'm a bit hot in 35C degree weather and the school keeps taking me out of classes to tell me I'm ruining my future" as a 10 year old kid over using a skirt every day. I believe grown men can deal with wearing pants that they can still choose the cloth of.
But yes, patriarchy definitely affects men too, neither of us have any need to be dealing with this nonsense. Feminism is not just for women's rights.
yeah... "a lot of pressure" translates to "you don't get hired" if it's clear you'll refuse or make a fuss about it or "they make your job painful every day" if you're already hired and refuse. It depends on the industry and company but it's pretty standard in most customer facing jobs. It was much worse 20 years ago than it is today
They're just one more way to control women.
There could be a whole dissertation written about this and I'm not gonna go there in a Lemmy Shitpost comment section. But I will say: "Women choose to wear them" - yes, and society has forced us in many ways by making it part of uniforms and being drilled into us since we're little kids that we need to conform if we want to succeed. I say 'we' because I'm a woman but I have never worn shoes like that and I never will, it has caused me issues to reject such standards. I'm lucky I chose a career where I've always been allowed to wear pants and sneakers instead of skirts and heels. When I was in primary school I would constantly get kicked out of class and sent to the principal's office because I chose to wear the uniform's winter pants during summer instead of skirts, couldn't wear the boy's shorts. Because me following the rules but refusing to wear a skirt was more important than me getting an education. "What will you do when you get a job?", "nobody will want to hire you with that attitude"... Men don't realize how much women's bodies are controlled from the moment we're born. It's gotten better in the last years but shit like that still happens more than yall realize.
I made an account yesterday and it all seemed fine but after some hours it went empty. Can't see any posts or anything and my profile is empty as well with a "?" as an icon 🤔
I see. If it's women that are her managers pressuring her into doing it then it's just internalized misogyny, she's not being pressured to be eye candy but those women pressuring her into it were on their time and never did the internal work to understand what was happening and why such regulations are backwards and pointless for actual professionalism. In any case I don't know your friend's situation, I'm just talking about the most common and prevalent situations. I was pressured by women to dress certain ways too, "you won't find a husband/job if you sit like that or don't wear make up or don't wear dresses", "heels would look so good on you!" (I'm quite short), "that's not very feminine of you", blah blah, it's just things that they were drilled into believing until they stopped questioning them and then they repeat it to the next generation / their peers.