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Step one: bedazzle the US President with pomp and circumstance and a “rare” visit somewhere special. In Britain’s case, this was Windsor Castle. In China, it was Zhongnanhai – the secretive compound for the Chinese leadership set in ancient imperial gardens.
Step two: follow the King’s example in Washington last month. Fob off the Great Narcissist with warm words about friendship between their two great nations before shafting him with such a subtle – but profoundly barbed – message that Trump is either obliged to pretend he hasn’t heard it, or has genuinely failed to grasp its import.
Xi warned Trump in Beijing to stay away from “clashes and conflicts” over Taiwan’s status and reinforced this point by urging him to avoid the “Thucydides Trap” – the theory that war breaks out when a rising power challenges a declining one. It took a while for the penny to drop that Xi thought America was in decline.
This led to some delusional spinning on Truth Social later that the Chinese leader was really harking back to the US under Joe Biden. “When President Xi very elegantly referred to the United States as perhaps being a declining nation, he was referring to the tremendous damage we suffered during the four years of Sleepy Joe,” Trump claimed.
Trump’s usual Maga cheerleaders were so perplexed by the China summit that they mostly ignored it. Sean Hannity of Fox News didn’t have that luxury, having travelled with Trump to Beijing. In an interview, he tried to press Trump on whether Xi had agreed Iran cannot have nuclear weapons, as Trump had claimed.
Well, not in so many words, Trump admitted. “He’s not going to respond too much. He’s a pretty cool guy. He’s not going to say that’s a good point.”
One popular Maga YouTuber, Benny Johnson, had valiantly attempted to project optimism before Trump came home empty-handed.
“Trump is winning BIG Today,” he initially claimed on X. “China trip is going better than anyone could have imagined. China helping bring Iran War to an end. Buying American oil. Massive trade deals. Stocks roaring.”
He later sounded more sober, saying Trump “thinks” President Xi will help the US reopen the Strait of Hormuz.
In fact, Xi had said nothing about reopening the Strait. Returning home on Air Force One, Trump admitted he hadn’t even asked for China’s help. “I don’t need favours,” he said. “I think automatically he’d like to see it opened up.”
Xi didn’t grant the US any greater hoped-for access to rare earth minerals, either, and Boeing’s share price dropped four per cent when it turned out China was only buying 200 out of 500 expected aircraft – and possibly not even that many. The tight-lipped Chinese foreign ministry wouldn’t say.
Once again, Maga can’t cope with the truth. There were no shouts or murmurs about the presence of middle son Eric Trump on the trip, even though Trump went ballistic over Joe Biden taking his son Hunter to Beijing in 2013 as vice-president.
Eric Trump’s net worth has risen tenfold to $400m since his father was re-elected, according to Forbes, but he was just in China in a “personal capacity”, according to the Trump Organization, which he represents.
Trump didn’t believe Biden when he said the same about Hunter, describing his presence in China as “a horrible thing” and clamouring for an investigation, but sure, let’s give Eric the benefit of the doubt.
When Hannity tried to press the President to repeat his previously extensive criticisms of China, he demurred. Trump U-turned, for instance, on whether China should be buying up tracts of land from farmers in the US, including near military installations – having railed against this on the 2024 campaign trail.
“You want to see farmers lose a lot of money? Just take that out of the market,” he chided Hannity.
He went on to sound like a raging liberal about the presence of Chinese students in the US: “I frankly think it’s good that people come from other countries and they learn our culture.”
Back in the US, Trump faces the reality of rising inflation, now at 3.8 per cent, fuel prices upwards of $4.50 a gallon and deepening hostility to his handling of the economy – 70 per cent disapprove and only 30 approve, according to the latest CNN poll.
It won’t help that Trump said before leaving for China “I don’t think about Americans’ financial situation” when considering the prospect of a nuclear-armed Iran. “Not even a little bit,” he explained.
Never mind though. The big conclusion he drew from his visit, as posted on Truth Social from Air Force One was: “China has a Ballroom, and so should the U.S.A.!”